Silent Abuse Rewrite
by Sunechirei
Summary: Watching your father die as a five year old will scar a person emotionally; having your mother blame you for it only worsens the trauma. Mikan has figured this out the hard way. Will transferring to a new school help her situation? Explanation inside. RxR
1. Chapter 1

Okay, so let's clarify something... this story is NOT mine. I found it on this site not long ago, but the entire thing bugged me so much that I decided to rewrite it. Basically the original writer was writing about something they obviously knew nothing about: abuse. One thing that really bugs me is when people think they know about it but they really don't. Abuse is not just something that you can easily write about, especially not in first person. There is so much more going on then just "oh my mother beats me, but it's no big deal" No way.

So I'm rewriting the entire thing. To the author, crazyanimelover326, I'm sorry but I did send you a message asking for permision, however I have gotten no response to I have decided to post it anyway.

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the writing. Gakuen Alice and all related characters belong to Higuchi Tachibana and the original plot belongs to crazyanimelover326.

The original is by crazyanimelover326 and is called Silent Abuse. Please read this one as well. You can find it on this person's profile page.

Please enjoy and comment. I would also appreciate if you could compare the two stories. Thank you

~Sunechirei

* * *

The abuse started when I was a kid, not long after my father died. I still have scars from some of the earlier days, though the emotional trauma will always be there. I didn't understand at the time what was going on, but now that I know more about life, more about death and sorrow, I have begun to understand why my mother did these things to me. However, it wasn't until I transferred to another school that I learned these things.

I was fifteen when that happened. It had been seven years after my father had died in an accident. It was my fault really. I wanted an ice cream cone, but the truck drove away before I managed to catch up to it. My father called to me, telling me that it was too late, and he would buy me one later. As I headed back to him, feeling sorry for myself, and car sped around the corner. The next thing I remember I'm sitting on the ground and my father lay in front of me, covered in blood.

The ambulance came, but it was too late. My father had died as soon as the car had hit him. My mother and I were in total shock and a police man had to drive us back to our house. It wasn't long after I got home that had it dawned on me. My father was dead, and it was my fault.

I cried myself to sleep that night.

Mom didn't talk to me for a while. Weeks passed but nothing changed between us. I went to school as normal and Mom went to work. But that changed one day. I came home with a bad grade on a spelling test. I showed it to my mom and she snapped.

"Can't you do anything right?" she screamed, slapping me across the face. I fell to the ground, completely shocked. Looking up at my mother, I saw anger blazing in her eyes. She scowled, grabbed her purse and ran out of the house.

The next few years were like a blur. I occasionally remember my mother's rages, her screaming, her violent tendencies. It was a long time before they calmed down. She was still abusive, though she didn't scream anymore. She was just cold. Very cold.

And that brings me the day the academy found me. The day that the silent abuse, began to stop.

* * *

I lay in my bed, dreading the noise that would force me to get up. Pain swelled in my arm from the previous night when I had accidentally broken a plate I was washing. The woman I thought was my mom had grabbed my arm, twisted in behind my back to the point that I could swear it was about to break before letting me go.

"Get out of my sight." she had hissed, punching me in the same arm so hard I fell backwards. I said nothing, fleeing to my room, tears running down my face. I couldn't show her my pain or my fear. I would just get hit more.

So I lay there that morning, not wanting to face my mother, but I knew I had to. I had to please her. I felt that maybe if I did, she would love me again.

The alarm next to me blared and I turned it off before _she_ came up. Slowly, I crawled out of bed and to the bathroom. I observed my arm where I had been hit last night. A deep purple bruise ran up and down my arm, reaching about five inches from my wrist, gathering in a dark circle near my shoulder. I shuddered. It had been a while since I had been hit this badly and the bruises from other attacks were beginning to fade.

I got dressed silently, wincing as I pulled on my uniform's sweater, and headed downstairs, rubbing my arm.

Moving like a shadow, I entered the kitchen. My mother was there, sitting at the table eating her breakfast, almost as though she were a normal person. I walked passed her like she wasn't there, and she ignored me as well. Feeling the hunger in my stomach, I reached towards the basket on the table to grab and apple. It hadn't been in my hands for even a second before a steely grasp grabbed my wrist. I gasped and let go.

"I just bought those apples yesterday. Don't go dirtying them with your filthy ways. You don't deserve breakfast anyway." she let go of my wrist, grabbed the apple that I had tried to take and threw it into the trash bin. I had to bite my tongue to keep from yelling at her. "Leave." she commented coldly.

I bowed and walked out of the room towards the front door. Slipping on my shoes I headed to school, hoping that she would be in a better mood by the time I got home.

I lived a mile away from school so I had to take the bus. I didn't mind. I lived in a small town outside of Tokyo city and the scenery was absolutely stunning. It was the only thing that kept me from running away from my life.

School wasn't much better than home though. Almost no one knew of my existence, not that I minded. If I had no friends, then there would be no distractions. It was because of this that I was the top of my class. I would give no reason for mother to hit me.

It didn't work that way.

So anyway, school started out like any other day. Noisy students filed into the classroom, wasting the teachers time. The lessons were boring and the teacher seemed to care less if we learned anything. I was the only one who took notes.

My life changed that day at lunch, however, when I was called into the principal's office.

Sighing, I stood up and headed down the hall, getting crashed into by crazy boys who never seemed to notice me. When I reached the office the door opened, without me even having to knock. Expecting my mother to be there, I was shocked to see two very different people standing on either side of the principal's desk.

One seemed to be, well gay. He wore frumpy clothing and kept his blonde hair long and wild. The other wore only black except for the white half mask on his face. Both were watching me with intent, but neither said anything.

"May I help you?" I asked with uncertainty. Behind the desk the principal looked very uncomfortable but he stood up and said;

"I have been informed that you are transferring schools, is this correct?"

If I were shocked, I showed no sign. I figured that my mother had suddenly decided to make me change schools again. "This is the first that I've heard of it. Why, what's going on?" I asked quietly

"You must be Mikan Sakura!" the man with blonde hair said suddenly. "Hello, my name is Anju Narumi and I will be your homeroom teacher from now on."

"But, why haven't I heard of this..." I began.

"You will find out more later" an icy voice explained. " The school you shall be attending is called Alice Academy. I assume that you have heard of it. Your mother will be informed and you shall be picked up in four hours. Do you understand?" I didn't but I said yes anyway. Bowing, I headed out of the room and headed home.

* * *

"Why the hell are you home early?"

This was my mother's greeting when I got back from school. I swallowed nervously, unsure of how she would react to the news.

"I was sent home due to the fact that I am transferring schools." I managed to say.

"You're what?"

"I was called to the office today and told that I am going to a new school, Alice Academy. I have no idea why."

Mom was silent for a while. She stared blankly at the T.V, not seeming to understand what I had just said.

"Mom..." I called. She banged her fist on the table, causing it to shake and me to flinch. I regretted that the moment it happened. My mom saw my jump and narrowed her eyes.

"Why the flinch Mikan? Are you afraid of me?" I said nothing. "Well, are you?" still nothing. "Answer me!"

"No." I said trembling. "I'm not afraid of you."

"Then why so scared?" she stood up and walked over to me. "You have no reason to be afraid of me. In fact, it's you people should be afraid of. After all, you did kill your own father."

I couldn't move. I knew that something bad was going to happen.

"You killed your own father, the only person who could love me, the only person I loved, and now you want to leave me alone?"

"Alone? I'm going to a boarding school?"

Mom slapped me. "Of course you are! Do you know nothing of the notorious Alice Academy." she slapped me again. "I thought you were smarter than that."

I opened my mouth to respond but no sound came out.

"You are leaving me. My only child is leaving me after she killed my husband. You're such a horrible girl, Mikan. A horrible horrible-" she stopped talking and reached out towards me, a strange glint in her eye. Her cold fingers ran down my cheek and I refrained from shuddering. "Go pack." she whispered. "What ever you don't pack, don't expect to see again."

She sat back down, watching what ever was on the T.V intently. I stumbled to my room, fear blinding me. It had been a long time since she had looked to angry. I finally managed to find the handle to my room and I wretched the door open.

I wanted to cry, I needed to cry, but the tears would not come. Collapsing on my bed, I wondered what was going on, why I was being transferred, and why my mom cared so much. She hated me, and yet she didn't seem to want to me to leave.

I lay on my bed for an hour, waiting for my body to stop trembling from the fear. Eventually, I stood up again. When I didn't fall over, I reached around for my bag and began to pack. I was done in fifteen minutes.

There was nothing I really wanted. Every materialistic item in my room had been there since I was eight, since before my father died. I wanted to get rid of them, but mother was too intent on keeping everything that had been touched by my father that I feared what she would do to me if I did get rid of them.

For the next two hours I waited in my room until I heard the door bell ring. I slipped downstairs and into the front room where I saw my mother talking to Narumi.

"Oh yes, I've heard about Alice Academy. That school for geniuses, right?"

Narumi smiled. "Yes, that's the one. Your daughter's test scores were high enough that we noticed her and she got accepted. I'm sorry about the suddenness of this all though."

"Oh no, that's perfectly fine. I understand that you guys are busy."

I was amazed at how well my mother was acting. I hadn't seen her so happy in a long time, even if the happiness was all an act.

"Oh, Ms. Sakura!" Narumi suddenly exclaimed. My mother turned around instantly. I put on a false smile.

"Hello, Mr. Narumi." I greeted. He smiled at me as I walked towards the door. He took my bag from me and I turned towards my mom.

"Good-bye." I said.

"Yes, good-bye, I will see you on Sunday." Mother replied. I was shocked that she would be seeing me, but I hid it and hugged her. The hug reminded me of my childhood and for an instant I felt like I had a real mother.

* * *

"Ms. Sakura... Ms. Sakura, we are here, it's time to wake up."

My eyes shot open and I looked around confused. I was sitting in the back of a car my head leaning against the window next to me. I rubbed my eyes and sat up. Mr. Narumi was watching me happily. He reached out his hand and I took it, getting pulled gently out of the car. I glanced at the building next to me and gasped.

"This place is huge!" I murmured in shock. Mr. Narumi laughed.  
"It's a government funded boarding school." he explained. "Though it's not for geniuses as we advertise." I gave him a confused look and he continued. "You see, every student in this school has a special ability of some sort. Including you."

"Special ability?" I asked.

"Yep. For instance, I can release pheromones that allow me to control people."

He must have noticed the fear that crossed through my eyes because he told me that it wouldn't affect me.

"You have the nullification alice. That's what we call them, alices." he smiled at me before continuing. "You also have a rare alice that we call the SCE, or steal, copy, erase alice. It is very valuable."

"So, I didn't come here because I'm smart?" I asked. Mr. Narumi shook his head, and for the first time in a long time, I felt special.

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

Hotaru sat at the table she shared with her two friends, Ruka and Natsume. She was fiddling with her newest invention as she waited for Narumi to come in. It was Friday, the last day of the week and something interesting was supposed to happen today.

However, the only thing remotely interesting that had happened today was when Natsume set the math teacher's desk on fire when the man was lecturing the students on proper behavior. But that was normal, and Hotaru did not like it when promises were broken.

"Hey, Imai, what are you making?" Ruka asked, trying to break the tension that tended to arise when Hotaru was angry. She smiled to herself.

"You'll find out eventually." she replied. Natsume snorted, receiving a glare from the infamous ice queen. He shrugged and continued to read his manga.

"I was afraid you'd say that." Ruka muttered. Hotaru let that comment go, continuing to work on her new project. The rest of the class was in chaos, not seeming to care that Narumi could walk in at any moment and use his alice on them. The last time that had happened, people had been unable to speak for the rest of class as they were infatuated with their stupid teacher.

Suddenly, the door burst open and the teacher walked in. Narumi looked around the class as the students scrambled to their seats.

"Well, I said that something interesting was going to happen today, and here she is!" he held his hands out towards the door and a pretty girl shuffled in. Hotaru was suddenly interested. She put down her device, startling Ruka and Natsume with the loud clunk, and observed the girl. She was wearing the winter uniform, though it was summer time, and she was wringing her hands.

"Every one, this is Mikan Sakura, your new classmate! Please welcome her." he looked down at the new member of the class. "Well Mikan, would you like to say anything?" Mikan shook her head and bowed. Narumi smiled at her. "Alright. Well then, Natsume, you are going to be her partner.

Next to Hotaru Natsume groaned. He hated being around girls as they tended to flirt with him all the time. Hotaru stifled a laugh. It wouldn't be long before the new girl fell for Natsume's looks, then things would be interesting.

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

No one left me alone on my first day at the new school. Students kept coming up to me, asking me questions, trying to be my friend. I smiled and took it all in without a complaint, though the fake smiles and forced politeness made me want to puke.

I wished that they would would have just left me alone. It was almost as if sitting in the back of the room and reading a large book was like an invitation instead of a barrier. It drove me insane. Eventually, people started to go back to their seats to work on homework or talk to their real friends and I was left alone.

That was how it should be.

That's what I told myself anyway. Getting close to people would only hurt more.

As I read, I wondered how this was going to play out. I had yet to figure out who Natsume was, but I guessed that he was very popular based on the reactions of the girls who had talked to me. They had gushed over the fact that I was the one who was partnered with him.

Play boys, another thing that made me mad.

I got about a quarter way into my book when the final bell rang. Sighing, I hurried out of the classroom, feeling as though I were constantly being watched. I didn't know it at the time, but I was being watched.

I headed outside and walked to the bus that Mr. Narumi had pointed out earlier. It took students to the town in the middle of campus, also known as Central Town.

I sat down in one of the empty seats and leaned against the window. No one was sitting near me, but I could feel their eyes on me.

"Why can't I be invisible like before?" I muttered. It wasn't fair. Before at least I could get by with only having to deal with my mom. At this school, I would have to try and hide the fact that I had been abused for many years. That would be very hard when people were always trying to talk to me, to get into my head.

When the bus pulled into the station at Central Town I was relieved to see that there were a lot of people there. It was easier to disappear into a crowd. I slipped off the bus and began to walk around the interesting little town.

There were shops of all kinds around, big ones, small ones, some that sold food, and others clothing. I walked around, amazed that such a place could exist in a school campus.

As I walked, I noticed a fancy looking shop. I grinned when I recognized the place.

It was a branch of my aunt's shop, Sexy Sweety, a place where I could get free sweaters and other clothing to hide my healing bruises and cuts. My mom had refrained from attacking my legs as all of my uniforms had required a skirt so I didn't need to worry about my legs, but the rest of my body...

I walked in and looked around. It was very crowded in the shop and I recognized some girls from my class. I walked around, weaving in and out of people to try and avoid them.

"Is there any way I can help you Miss?" I heard behind me. Shocked, I turned around and came to face to face with a sales person.

"Um... well I'm actually wondering if Kiyoko Sakura was here?"

"I'm sorry, but Ms. Sakura hardly ever comes to this branch. Is there anything else I can help you with?"

I glanced around uncertainly. "Well, you see, I'm her niece so..."

"Really? That's pretty amazing!" the woman said. I gave her a strange look.

"Don't you want proof?"

"Not really. I thought that you were Mikan when I saw you come in here. Ms. Sakura has many pictures of you in her offices." I smiled at her.

"Can you take me to the back then? I Kinda want to look for a few things."

"But of course! Come, come!" she led me into the back of the store. My aunt knew nothing about her sister's abusive tendencies but she loved to give me free things. I always felt guilty when I took advantage of this, but it always made her happy so I kept doing it. One less person to worry about.

Two hours later, I was back on the bus, heading to the dorms with a bag of new clothes. I had left almost all of my old ones back home as they reminded me of my mother. I was feeling quite content by what I had been able to pull of that day.

It was dark by the time the bus stopped. I got out of it and headed towards my room that was located on the fourth floor. Mr. Narumi had told me that only students with the special status were allowed to live on this floor. I didn't quite understand why I was in this group of people but I didn't want to complain.

I opened the door and marveled at the size of my new room. It was much larger and better furnished than my room back home. I dropped all of my stuff and collapsed onto my new bed. It was so soft I felt as though I were on a bed of fresh snow, though it wasn't quite as cold.

In an instant I was asleep.

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

"Imai, your obsession with this new girl is kinda creepy... what's with you?" Ruka asked. Hotaru looked at him but said nothing. She was interested in this girl because the peculiar and she was hiding something. Hotaru loved to find out people's secrets.

"Imai?"

"Shut up."

Hotaru had forced Ruka, much to his displeasure, to come with her while she stalked Mikan through Central Town. She had discovered many thing about her. For instance, she was rich, a famous woman's niece, she was in the special rank, and she never showed skin above the knees.

"If she has all of these things going for her, why is she so antisocial, and what is her secret?"

"Uh, probably that she is rich, has a famous aunt and is in the special rank."

Hotaru reached over and smacked Ruka upside the head. "Are you an idiot? I didn't mean those things. She is hiding something else and I want to know what it is."

Ruka rubbed his head and sat down on the bench near the entrance to the dorms, pouting.

"Look, I'm really tired and there is nothing else we can do tonight. Can I go back to my dorm?"

"Nope."

"Why not?"

"Because I said so."

"Goodnight Imai."

Ruka stood up and walked back to the boys dorms leaving Hotaru standing alone.

"What are you hiding from me?" Hotaru muttered to herself before walking into the building herself.

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

I stood at the entrance to my room, waiting for my mom to come. It was Sunday and my mother had promised to come and visit. I hoped that she would be happy to see me, but I didn't get my hopes up.

"Mikan?" I heard someone call. I looked aver and saw Mom standing there. I was surprised at my joy when I saw her.

"Mom... Mom how are you?" I asked. I never could describe the feeling I had at that moment, but it didn't last long.

"You... how could you do this to me?" she whispered. I stepped back.

"What?"

"You left me, you went to this school. You left me. Now I am alone. And I have all of these bills to pay from your new school." she stepped towards me, her entire body trembling from rage. She reached forward and grabbed my already injured arm. I cringed from pain and she dragged me into my room.

I was then thrown onto the floor and my mom stepped on me to get to the other side of my room.

"You are so spoiled Mikan." she said distantly. "So spoiled. I can't believe we are related in anyway. I'm so ashamed that you are my daughter."

I began to stand up. My mother heard me and turned swiftly, kicking me back down on the ground.

"Don't you dare..."

She began to walk around my room again touching things, pushing things around.

"So, while you are living in this wonderful place, I'm stuck all alone in that dreary house, and it's all your fault."

I froze up on the ground. My voice became lost in my throat and I felt tears welling up in my eyes. Why they were there I couldn't tell. It was either because of the excruciating pain that was spreading through my stomach, or the fear that filled my entire body.

"Well, what do you have to say for yourself?"

I still couldn't speak. This did not make my mother happy. She grabbed a chunk of my hair and lifted me into the air. I could do nothing to stop it.

"No answer? Well I expect one next week when I come again." she let me go and I slumped on the ground. I didn't hear her leave, but I knew she was gone. I began sobbing.

The tears wouldn't stop this time. I don't even know how long I had been crying before I finally calmed down.

I stood up shakily, heading into the bath room and turning on the shower. I didn't even take of my clothes before climbing beneath the ice cold water. I sat on the tiled floor, staring blankly at the wall.

"Somebody save me."

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

Natsume listened carefully to what Hotaru was telling him. He had already known that the new girl was weird, but what Hotaru was saying was even more shocking. She had discovered many things about Mikan, though she still felt as though the girl was hiding something from them.

"That's all I've been able to find out." Hotaru finished after about ten minutes of lecturing.

"That girl is really weird." Ruka added. "I mean, she hardly knows of your existence Natsume and yet you are the most popular guy in our class _and_ you're her partner."

Natsume nodded. He had run into the girl a few times before and she had completely ignored him. It also didn't help that no one knew what her alice was. Koko didn't seem to be able to read her mind and she wasn't talking to anyone. It was bugging him, though not as much as it did Hotaru.

Neither Natsume nor Ruka had ever seen Hotaru this interested in someone and the three of them had been friends since elementary school.

"Do you guys have any idea what she might be hiding?" Natsume asked. Hotaru and Ruka both shook their heads and Natsume sighed. This girl was good at hiding things if no one even had a clue as to what she was hiding from them.

"I will find out." Hotaru vowed. "There is no way that girl can keep these things from me for too long."

"Maybe something will happen tomorrow in our split classes." Ruka suggested. "She's in the special abilities class, right? Well we will just have to follow her somehow."

The three students looked at each other and nodded.

They need a plan to get Mikan's secrets out, one that would work.


	2. Chapter 2

Well here's chapter 2. I'm kinda unhappy with parts of it though so i will be most likely posting a revise later, it depends on what reviews i get... Speaking of reviews, how hard is it to give feedback, seriously? If you have the time to read past chapter one than you have time to say something about my writing. Anything, good or bad. I need criticism or I won't get better. So please, review. Thanks.

Also to the people out there who did comment, thank you and I will answer the random questions that came up, even though there were only two.

To Sitting in the Silence: In the original it was Yuka so in this story it is too. I know that the normal Yuka would never do this but as it is an AU, the characters tend to be very different.

To Dog: This actually has nothing to do with my story but my profile. One of my friends pulled a prank on me and changed some things around in my profile which is why they were contradictory, and sorry to disappoint you, but I'm not christian.

So yeah, please review my story, as well as give your feedback so i can change somethings. I actually will listen to you.

~Sunechriei

* * *

"Hey."

Out of the corner of my eye I could see the strange girl who had been following me for the past few days. Her name was Hotaru Imai. I ignored her and continued reading my book. We were alone in a cafe that was located in the bookshop near the small park in Central town.

Hearing footsteps I got up and left the table, looking down at my feet. I wondered why she wouldn't just leave me alone. Whether or not I was happy was none of her business. I felt her eyes on me as I walked swiftly out of the store and into the bright light. I continued to avoid that girl for the rest of the day.

* * *

"Today is the day you split into your ability classes!" Mr. Narumi announced the next day. I was confused as to what he meant, and was surprised when a deep voice behind me answered my unannounced question.

"You were probably told what ability class you're in on the first day of school."

I turned to face whoever was talking. It was the boy that all the girls fussed over. Natsume Hyuuga. I had to admit, he was hot. Really hot. But he had nothing to do with me.

"Thank you." I said bluntly, standing up. I began to walk out of the room when he called after me.

"Do you have any idea where you are supposed to go?" I stopped in my tracks, irritated that he was still talking to me. No one was left in the room.

"No."

"Well then, how about I show you. What class?"

"I don't need your help, especially since you have no obligation _to_ help me."

"Yes I do. I'm your partner, remember?"

I grimaced, remembering that Mr. Narumi had partnered me with this boy. "I still don't need your help." I replied distantly.

"I'm guessing that since you have the nullification alice, you would be in the special ability class." I heard Natsume come up behind me. I froze when he reached forward and grabbed my hand from behind me. "I happen to know where that class is located. Let me take you there." he nearly whispered. Shivers ran down my spine as I wrenched my hand out of his.

"I told you, I don't need your help."

"If you insist." Natsume walked past me, a grin spread across his face. After he left I ran out of the room and headed in the direction I guessed the class would be. Mr. Narumi had showed me the basic area of the class on my first day, so I headed over there.

It wasn't hard to find the class. It had many insults written over the door, bashing on the special students. It made me laugh that I was in the rejected group of kids.

I reached out my hand to open the door and hesitated. Sure, I was supposed to attend class, but I wondered if it was really necessary. I didn't get along with people, and this whole class was about learning things about yourself and others. I would just be the odd one out, like always.

"You going in, or not?"

I spun around. Behind me was a boy, older than me, tapping his foot impatiently. I didn't know what to say.

"If you're here to attack our door again, you're going to regret it." the boy said, stepping forward, cracking his knuckles. I flinched. The footsteps stopped and I opened my eyes slowly.

"I was kidding you know. I would never hurt a girl." he said, his eyes full of concern. "You must be Mikan?" I nodded slowly. "Sorry. I knew that there was going to be a new girl today, but..." he looked ashamed for threatening me.

I tried to tell him it was okay, but the door behind me burst open before I could say anything.

"Dammit Tsubasa! What is taking you so long! The new girl is going to be here any second!" A paint can flew past me, hitting the boy square in the face. I ducked down, covering my head with my arms.

"Hey, Misaki! I just ran into the new girl so quit acting like a bitch!" Tsubasa, the boy, yelled back. He sat up and pointed at the pitiful figure that was me. I could feel Misaki's eyes on me as I slowly uncovered my face. She watched me for a while before turning back to Tsubasa.

"Well then, why didn't you say so?" She squatted next to me. "Sorry about that. That kid over there is just a brat who is lazy."

"I'm not a kid, I'm almost eighteen..." Tsubasa muttered, standing up.

"Anyway, Mikan, I want to welcome you to the special abilities class." Misaki said kindly, lifting me gently by the arms. I grimaced in pain. The bruises from Sunday still hurt but I tried to hide my pain. Luckily, neither Tsubasa nor Misaki seemed to notice that I was hurt as the showed me the class.

There weren't many people in the class, but they all smiled warmly at me, yelling welcome. I was overwhelmed with joy and shock that they had bothered putting this together for me.

I looked down at my feet, unsure of what to say.

"So, you are as quiet as the rumors say." I heard Tsubasa comment. My face turned red. I had been unaware of the fact that people were gossiping about me. "Well, that doesn't really matter. I can tell you're thankful."

I looked up at him, saw the red circle on his face from the paint can and let out a small giggle. It was just too funny for me.

"Hey she laughed!" someone yelled from inside the class.

"That's awesome. Tsubasa, you got the new girl to laugh. How?"

"Probably with his ridiculous looking face."

I couldn't help myself. I started laughing, along with all the rest of the students. It felt good to laugh again. I couldn't even remember the last time that I had.

"Well, now that we've got you laughing, how about you talk to us?" Tsubasa said. Choruses of yeahs echoed throughout the room and I looked down. It was now or never.

"My name is Mikan Sakura." I began slowly. The entire room was silent, listening to my every word. The attention felt odd. "I have the nullification alice, and I am a special star. I don't really talk that much... but I hope that you will take care of me." I bowed, hoping that I hadn't made a fool of myself.

"Yay! You finally said something!" Tsubasa cheered. I felt his strong arms lift me in the air and spin me around, like my father had once done. I gasped, unsure of what I should do. Everyone was laughing at me.

"P-please put me down!" I stuttered. Tsubasa complied to my wish, setting me down on the ground. I was shaking madly, scared of what was going to happen next. Misaki walked over to me.

"Hey, are you okay?" she asked. I nodded, but it didn't seem to convince her. She looked at Tsubasa and nodded. I wondered what they were doing when Tsubasa reached down and grabbed by wrist.

Pain swelled in my arm and I clenched my teeth. No one was speaking.

"Mikan, why are you so shy?" Tsubasa asked. I shook my head, not wanting him to know. "Please, just tell me. I can tell that there is something wrong, and this is not normal." using his other hand, he pushed up the my sleeve, revealing my bruised arm. Tears welled in my eyes and I continued to shake my head.

People were whispering now. I tried to get away from my upper-upperclassman, but he held on tight.

"Mikan, it's okay." Misaki said softly. "We won't tell anyone why, but it's true, this isn't normal.

The tears had become so bad that I could barely see. It was then that I realized that some people really do care about others. I don't really know why I did it, but I told them.

"M-my m-m-mother. S-sh-she a-a-a-abuses me." I managed to get out. I heard Misaki gasp and Tsubasa let go of my arm. I pulled back from them, expecting them to leave me alone, but instead Misaki hugged me. It was painful at first from all of my injuries, but eventually I was able to relax.

"There must be something we can do! We need to tell someone."

I pulled away. "N-no. You promised." I whispered hoarsely.

"Okay. I'm sorry. We won't tell anyone. Right?" everyone in the class responded, and I felt somewhat relived.

"Thank you."

* * *

The rest of that class had gone well. No one mentioned the scene again, instead inviting me to play games, eat some food and talk about random things. It had made me happy.

I lay in my bed that evening, thinking about the day's events. I had a feeling that if Tsubasa and Misaki had figured that something was wrong so quickly, then the other students might have too. It would explain why they had been following me.

Turning over, I decided that I would ask the two tomorrow how they had figured it out.

* * *

I was the first one in class the next day. I sat back in the far corner again, reading a new book. No one tried to talk to me this time, and I smirked. I knew this was going to happen. No one ever tried to be friends with me for a long time.

After the class had been filled with students, Mr. Narumi walked in.

"Hello everyone! Welcome to another day in my classroom. Today will be a normal day so please make sure to be ready for classes. Also, Mikan, you don't belong over in that corner. Please come sit next to your partner.

I grimaced but followed suit. I sat next to Natsume, not forgetting what had happened the day before. I still didn't understand why I had felt the way I did, but I ignored him, trying to push that feeling out of my mind.

"Well, then Polka, you going to be civil today?" he asked with a smirk on his face.

I didn't know what he meant by polka until I remembered what underwear I was wearing. I blushed crimson and ignore him. I could tell he wanted a reaction. I had seen many guys do this to girls to see how they would react.

"I guess not."

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

Mikan was crimson as Natsume muttered his question. He knew that she would be embarrassed by this, and he was hoping she would say something, but he didn't get the reaction he was hoping for.

"I guess not" he muttered angrily, sitting back in his chair. Narumi left, leaving the room for the math teacher, Jinno. He stormed in looking as though someone had thrown a trashcan on him.

Natsume hid his laughter.

"Mr. Jinno," a whiny voice said loudly, "I think you should test to see how smart our new student is, after all, she hasn't spoken to us once and I think she may be retarded."

Natsume looked around and spotted the speaker. Luna. The brattiest girl in the entire class. Jinno smirked.

"I agree, Ms. Sakura, please come down and do this problem."

Next to Natsume, Mikan stood silently and made her way to the board. She picked up a piece of chalk and began to solve the difficult equation that had been written on the board. She was done in a few minutes.

The entire class was shocked that she had gotten the answer right. Jinno gave a rare smile.

"Excellent job. You may sit."

Natsume looked over at Luna and laughed inwardly at her reaction. The girl was furious.

Mikan sat down again.

"Well who knew Polka, you're smart after all." Natsume commented slyly. He glanced at her, hoping to get a reaction and was disappointed, again. Mikan was pulling out her textbook, continuing to ignore her partner. Natsume didn't know how much more he could take of this.

He knew that Hotaru was right when she had said Mikan was hiding something from them. Natsume had become even more determined to find out what that secret was.

* * *

When the bell for lunch finally rang, Mikan hurried out of the class room. Natsume watched her with interest.

"So, anything?" he heard behind him.

"Nope." he replied, turning to face Hotaru and Ruka. "I couldn't even get a good reaction yesterday." Ruka and Hotaru exchanged glances.

"Well, we should probably head to lunch then." Ruka said slowly. It was obvious that Natsume was angry, and any little thing could set him off when he was like that. Natsume nodded and stood up.

The three walked down the halls towards the cafeteria. By the time they got there, Mikan had already gotten her food and was sitting at the table where the other special ability kids sat.

"That's interesting." Hotaru muttered. "Very interesting. Very interesting indeed."

"Um, Imai, I don't mean to be rude, but what's interesting?" Ruka asked. Hotaru ignored him, heading towards the table that they normally sat at. Next to it was the table that Luna and her group sat.

Natsume listened in on their conversation.

"We should go over there and get Mikan to become our friend, and then as payback, let's spread all of her secrets to the entire student body." Luna said venomously. Natsume shuddered. He would hate to be on the receiving end of Luna's wrath. As stupid as the girl seemed, she had a lot of connections and she could call on them at any moment.

"Let's go then."

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

I still didn't really know what to say around my new friends. They were a very talkative bunch, not like me at all. I did my best though, smiling at their jokes and answering any question they asked. I hadn't quite found the courage to ask Tsubasa or Misaki how they had known about my secret, but I was working on that.

"Uh oh, prep alert." Misaki whispered suddenly. I turned around and saw Luna and some of her friends coming over to our table.

"Hey Mikan, what's up?" Luna asked in a sickly sweet voice. I shuddered. "You should ditch those freaks and come hang out with us."

I'm pretty sure the look on my face was a mixture of confusion and disgust, but I wasn't quite sure.

"Why would she want to go with you?" Misaki asked sweetly. "You are probably just going to use her for some reason and then throw her away once she's useless to you."

"I would never! I just think that she should hang out with her own kind, you know, the students who actually have talent."

Misaki stood up and glared at Luna. I had a strange feeling that they had been friends at one point, though why Misaki would befriend Luna was a mystery to me.

"I won't go with you." I whispered. "I like it here."

Luna was looking at me, disgusted. "You can't be serious. A special star like you shouldn't hang out with these pieces of trash."

I breathed in.

"They are not trash, you are." I said, my voice shaking madly. "I happen to get along with them so please leave."

I had no idea what possessed me to say this, but I was glad I did. Luna huffed angrily and stormed away.

"That. Was. Great!" Tsubasa cheered. I felt relieved. The rest of lunch that day went smoothly. Nothing of any interest happened, and I started to talk more. Finally, I felt at home.

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

Natsume, Ruka and Hotaru were standing by the entrance to the field, talking about the events that had happened at lunch that day. It was P.E, and not a single person was doing what they were supposed to; run laps.

The coach's eyes were bugging as he tried to get his class to do what he wanted them to. It wasn't working.

"So, she talked back to Luna? I wasn't expecting that." Hotaru said. She leaned against the fence, her eyes glued on Mikan.

"Did you not hear Luna talking about it earlier? She was really angry." Ruka replied, shuddering. "I do not envy that girl right now." Natsume and Hotaru nodded in agreement.

"I knew that something bad was going to happen when Luna walked over there, but I didn't think it would be this bad..." Natsume muttered. He looked at Mikan as well. She was standing alone by the teacher. It seemed that she was waiting for the rest of the class to start running, but Natsume knew that wasn't going to happen. Only a few teachers in this school could actually control the students. The gym teacher was not one of them.

"What should we do then?" Hotaru asked.

"I don't know. Maybe..."

Hotaru and Natsume turned to look towards Ruka.

"Maybe what?" Natsume prompted.

"Well, maybe if I invited her to my family's beach house for the four day weekend..."

"Ruka, you're an idiot!" Hotaru nearly screamed. Natsume gave her a look a disbelief.

"How?" Ruka asked tentatively.

"Why didn't you mention this before? It's perfect." an evil looked glinted in her eye. She grabbed Ruka's arm and dragged him away.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"We're going to talk to your mom." she stated bluntly. Natsume hid a laugh as Ruka mouthed 'help me' back at him.

"You're on your own!" he called in response, letting out his laughter. The bell rang, ending classes and Natsume walked over to Mikan.

"Looks like you're getting along with your new classmates, well not the ones in your actual class but..." he teased. Mikan glanced at him as she headed inside.

"Is there anything I can help you with?"

"Yeah, I want to know what you're hiding."

Mikan tensed up. "I don't know what you're talking about." she muttered, turning away.

"I know you're hiding something, and I want to know what it is." he stepped closer to Mikan and grabbed her wrist. "You could save me the trouble of finding out, and just tell me you know."

"I still don't know what you want. I'm not hiding anything from you."

"Really?" he questioned, pulling Mikan in towards him until her back rested against body. "Then I guess that being the niece of the famous Kiyoko Sakura isn't a secret then?"

Mikan tried to pull away, put Natsume wrapped one arm around her waist and kept her close.

"How do you know about that?" she asked. Natsume leaned in.

"I have my sources." he whispered. "Now, will you tell me?"

All of a sudden a shooting pain ran up Natsume's leg. He let go of Mikan and she ran away from him.

"That-" he muttered. Mikan had stomped on his foot. A bold move for someone who never talked to anyone. Sighing, Natsume followed Mikan into the school.

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

I raced through the hallways, shaking like mad. Not only did Natsume know that I was keeping something from them, but I had also hurt him! I couldn't believe that I had been so stupid. I finally came to a stop in front of my dorm room, panting.

I fumbled with my key in an attempt to unlock my door. At the time I couldn't tell what emotion was running hotter, fear or lust. I had never been that close to a boy before, and though I had done a good job hiding my embarrassment from Natsume, I could feel my face burning.

Finally, I managed to open my door. I collapsed on my bed, hoping that sleep would come easily to me, but I had no such luck.

I lay there, thinking about what had just happened, unable to get the feeling of Natsume pressed up against me out of my mind. I shuddered at the heat that was still lingering on my body.

I finally managed to fall asleep four hours later.

* * *

I wanted to ditch the next day. How I would face Natsume, I didn't know.

Feeling more exhausted than usual, I slipped into the classroom and made my way to my seat. Natsume was already there and I could feel my face heat up. Silently, I sat down and ignored everyone around me. Natsume said nothing as well as his nose was buried in a book of manga.

Homeroom passed quickly with nothing interesting happening. I was able to pull off not speaking for the entire time, though my thoughts drifted to my mom.

She hadn't tried to contact me since Sunday, though I was pretty sure that she would come again this week. After all, she had been pretty serious about me answering her question, not that I understood what she wanted. I gripped the edges of my book tightly at the memory.

My stomach was still in pain from when she had stepped on me, and the new bruises I had obtained were still dark purple. I felt as though I were about to cry.

"Mikan?"

I glanced up, blinking away any tears that were threatening to form. In front of me was the blonde boy that Nastume was always hanging out with. I looked back down at my book.

"Um, well I wanted to invite you to my beach house this weekend. Well I mean, since it's a four day weekend I figured that you might want to come with us..."

I looked over my book at him. I couldn't believe that he was inviting me to come with him but I was hesitant. If Natsume knew that something was up with me, then this boy probably knew as well. Slowly, I shook my head.

"Why not? It would give you a good chance to get to know some of your classmates, well three of them, and you could hang out away from school for a few days."

I kept shaking my head. Who knew what my mother would do if I left to stay at a beach house. Though it would be nice to get away from her for another week. I slammed my book shut at the mention of this.

I saw Ruka jump at the sound of my closing book.

"Please?" he asked again, his voice rising an octave. I looked around me, trying to find an escape.

"Let's give up asking her, Nogi." a cold voice said from behind me. I turned and saw the other girl that hung with Natsume. "We should just ask her mother. It would be easi-"

"No!" I yelled standing up. The entire class went silent and stared at me. My eyes were wide with fear and I dug my nails into the desk. "No, she's, she's always busy." I muttered in a quieter voice. "She wouldn't appreciate it if you guys called her."

"Well it's either that or you come with us." Hotaru said in a threatening voice. I gulped and nodded, feeling like I was going to regret this. A grin spread over Hotaru's face. "Excellent. We're leaving tomorrow first thing. Oh and don't bother packing anything, Nogi's mom will have all the stuff you need there. Just come as you are."

I sat down, defeated. There was no way I could get out of this. I looked down at my book and figured I should ask Tsubasa at lunch what I should do about this, though the thought of depending on him made me shiver with resentment. I hated having people do things for me.

I didn't say a word for the rest of the morning and no one seemed to mind. At the lunch bell I scampered out of the room and hurried to the cafeteria.

No one was there when I arrived and I scrambled to the table I had been sitting at everyday. It wasn't long before I was joined by my classmates. They were chatting about the most random things and it made me smile.

"Hey Mikan! Long time no see." Misaki called out to me. "Excited for the four day weekend? I know I am!" she laughed and sat down next to me. I nodded and continued to pick at my lunch in an attempt to figure out how I should bring my dilemma up. I was lucky that Tsubasa as quick to notice my hesitation on things.

"Is something wrong?" he asked, sitting on the other side of me. I placed my utensil on my plate and sighed.

"Well, Ruka Nogi invited me to his beach house this weekend and I kinda was forced to say yes, but..."

"Forced? How?"

"Um, you see Imai threatened to call my mom so..."

"That's so mean! How could they do that to you?"

"Well they don't know about her, but that's not my point. I kinda need your guys' help." I closed my eyes, waiting for them to say that they couldn't or that it would be too much of a bother, but those words didn't come. Instead Misaki and Tsubasa started talking about ways to get me out of this mess, and from across the table I could hear some of the others talking about it as well.

I smiled to myself.

"You guys, I actually think I should go, I just need help hiding my injuries." I explained quietly. Misaki nodded.

"I think I can help you with that. I know some kids who owe me a favor and I can convince them to find you someone with a healing alice."

I thanked her. Tsubasa also chimed in.

"I know some people with invisibility alices. Maybe we can make your bruises invisible."

Many others also had ideas. Eventually we went with Misaki and Tsubasa's ideas.

"Thank you all so much." I said, grateful to have help.

* * *

The end of the day was hectic. All of the teachers were assigning random homework pages that we had to do over break and the students were doing their best to ignore the lesson and ditch class. I guessed that this happened every year as the teachers weren't as angry as most others would be.

When school finally ended for the weekend, I glanced over my homework. It seemed to be easy review sheets and I figured that I could do them before I went to bed that night.

I began to walk back to the dorms when Tsubasa came around the corner of the building.

"Oh Mikan, there you are! I have great news. Misaki and I were able to get the alice stones of the people we told you about." Tsubasa held out his hand, revealing two different colored stones lay in the middle of his hand. I was amazed at their beauty, having never seen an alice stone before. "Here, hold out your hand."

I looked up at him and shook my head. I couldn't just take these from him. Could I? I always knew that there was a fine line between taking something as a gift from a friend, and then taking something selfishly. At that point in my life I didn't know the difference.

"Come one Mikan, I got these for you so you could continue to hide the fact that you have an abusive mother, so take them!"

Slowly I reached out my hand and opened it. Tsubasa dropped the light colored stones onto it and closed my hand.

"Use them well, young padawan." he said in a deep voice. I giggled and bowed.

"Thank you. I don't know how to repay you."

"Get better." was all Tsubasa said before he bid me farewell. I opened my hand again and examined the stones. They were very pretty little things but I knew they were powerful. Even with the healing stone in my hand I could feel the cuts and bruises begin to disappear. I closed my eyes and thanked Tsubasa again, even though he wasn't there.

Carefully, I thought about what I wanted, multiple alice stones. I could feel more stones appear in my hand, almost as if by magic. Sighing, I opened my eyes and hand and looked down. There were multiple of the two colored stones sitting in my hand and I smiled.

It had taken me forever to find out how to use my SCE alice, but once I had, it was like a barrier had been lifted. I was now able to make copies of what ever alice stone I held. It was useful, especially at that time.

I hurried back to my room, ready to face the challenges of the next day.


	3. Chapter 3

Well, like the last chapter, I am not exactly satisfied with this one, though it is better than the last (in my opinion). By the end of it I was beginning to get sick of the words I was using to tell how someone said something, so I looked up synonyms on the interweb. Yes, I know it's called the internet, don't judge me.

So I am completely being a hypocrite here... I say that you should write what you know, not what you think you know and I know nothing about love and yet there is a lovey dovey scene in here.... please don't complain. I know that I am a sad child who has never dated anyone much less been kissed, but I did my best so that I could add some love in here... so yeah... I basically took what I've seen from movies and what not so I know it's cliche but I tried.

Yeah, so please enjoy the third chapter of the rewrite and for heaven's sake, please review. I have over 200 hits to this story and only seven reviews. It's not that hard. So yeah. Enjoy!

~Sunechirei

* * *

I was woken the next morning by someone rudely banging on my door. I sat up and rubbed my eyes wondering what time it was. Glancing at the clock I groaned. It was only five in the morning. I stood up and walked over to the door, wondering who could be rude enough to wake me.

Opening the door I saw Hotaru carrying a suitcase.

"Imai?" I said groggily. "What are you doing?" Hotaru rolled her eyes at my use of her last name.

"Stop with the formalities and get dressed. We're leaving."

"Leaving. Um... okay?" I walked back towards my bed, Hotaru following close behind me. She was looking around my room with interest, though I couldn't figure out why. I headed into the bath room and got dressed as quickly as I could. I had a feeling in my gut that something bad was going to happen on this trip and I was reluctant to to, but I knew I had to. It was either go willingly or feel the wrath of my mother for disturbing her.

I splashed my face with water in an attempt to get me to wake up. It didn't work. I sighed and dried my face before heading back into the main part of my room.

Hotaru had turned on one of the lights and was sitting on my bed, fiddling with something. She turned around when she heard me come in.

"Oh there you are. Finally. We don't have all day you know. We have to leave as soon as possible." She stood up and hurried over to me, holding out her hand. A silver cell phone lay in her palm and she beckoned for me to take it.

"What is this for?" I asked taking it from her.

"Well we are obviously going to need a way to contact you." Hotaru stated. "I have talked to your friends from the special class, they have your number and you have theirs plus mine, Nogi's and Hyuuga's."

"You really didn't have to do this." I mumbled looking through the contact list.

"Yes I did. Now come on. Nogi and Hyuuga are waiting for us and if you don't hurry there is going to be hell to pay."

I shuddered at the last sentence. It reminded me of some of the things my mother used to say when she had first begun with the abuse.

"Mikan come on, let's go!" Hotaru grabbed my wrist and dragged me out of the room. I wanted to protest but held my tongue. I figured that there was nothing I could do and I might as well go along with what she wanted.

It wasn't long before we made it outside, the chilling air crisp, yet foggy. There was a limo in front of the dorms and the two boys were leaning against it. I had already guessed that Ruka was rich, but this just topped the cake.

"Sakura!" He exclaimed when he saw me. "I'm glad you can come. My mom is going to be so happy that someone other than Natsume and Imai are coming, not that she doesn't love you two." Ruka said, cowering from the glare Hotaru was giving him.

"Yes." she hissed in an icy voice. "Mrs. Nogi will be overjoyed to see you." I watched the two with interest, wondering how they could be considered friends. It seemed to me that Hotaru was blackmailing Ruka in some way. It didn't matter at that moment however as the door to the limo opened and I was quite literally shoved inside.

The others got in next to me and I prepared for a very uncomfortable car ride.

* * *

It _was_ uncomfortable. Even though it was only for half an hour, I felt as though I were in the spot light. Hotaru and Ruka kept asking me questions while Natsume just stared at me. I had a feeling that all three of them knew I was hiding something and that Natsume's source was Hotaru. She just seemed to be that kind of girl.

I answered their questions with little interest, instead thinking about the past two weeks. It had been a strange experience to not be living with my mother, to not have to deal with her everyday, it was a relief I guess.

Eventually the limo pulled into the driveway of a gigantic house. I peered out the window, all thoughts of my mother gone. Calling the house a mansion would be an understatement. I could swear that it was the size of a castle, though when I mentioned this Natsume snorted and told me this was nothing compared to Ruka's regular house.

I was dumbstruck at this statement. I couldn't understand how anyone would want to live in a house this size, but this was coming from the girl who had lived in an apartment her entire life.

"You coming?" Ruka asked. I turned towards him startled and realized that there was no one left in the car. I nodded nervously before sliding out after them.

The scenery before me was gorgeous. I felt as though I were no longer in Japan, but in some tropical island in the Caribbean. From behind the house I could hear the sweet sound of waves, bringing memories flooding into my head. My father used to always bring me to the ocean to play, though Mom never came with us. It was my alone time with him and it was always so much fun. We would play in the sand, building castles, burying each other, searching for shells, and going swimming in the cold Pacific water. I breathed in the air, treasuring the memories that I had once shared with my father.

I was still in dreamland when Hotaru herded me to the front door. The inside of the house was just as marvelous as the outside, if not more so. I was in shock for quite a while before a shrill voice echoed through the entryway.

"Ruka! My baby hello!"

Next to me Ruka turned a deep crimson. "Hey Mom."

"Natsume, it's been such a long time since I last saw you, and you too Hotaru dear. It's so nice to have you back in my wonderful beach house." she glided down the stairs that led to a large balcony. She came to a stop in front of her son and hugged him. I flinched away from the two.

It was obvious from the appearance that these two were related. Both with golden blonde hair and sea blue eyes, it would be hard to mistaken them for anything but mother and child. Eventually she turned her attention on me.

"And you must be Mikan Sakura." she said sweetly. I smiled and nodded. "Oh you must not remember me do you." I stepped back in shock. Know her? I couldn't recall ever meeting this woman. "I'm a friend of your aunts. In fact her shop is one of the sponsors for my husbands company. I've met you before you know."

"I see." I muttered.

"Oh dear. You've changed so much. I guess the death of your father was a huge impact on you."

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

An eerie silence filled the room as Mrs. Nogi's words echoed away. Mikan looked as though she were on death's door when Ruka's mom mentioned her father, though it was a shock to the other three that he was dead.

"It's such a shame that he was involved in that horrible accident. I always liked your father, even if he was a little strange. But that doesn't matter, he was a great father and husband." Mrs. Nogi closed her eyes and shook her head. Mikan had begun to tremble, though the woman seemed not to notice. "How's your mother dear?"

"Fine." Mikan muttered through clenched teeth. Natsume quickly noticed that Mikan seemed to be on the verge of tears so he quickly changed the subject.

"I think we should go swimming." he said. He could tell that Hotaru was giving him a death glare. This was the perfect chance to find out about Mikan, but Natsume would have to deal with her wrath later. "I know we just got here but the car ride was annoying and it would be nice if we could go hang out on the beach for a little while."

Mrs. Nogi clapped her hands and turned towards Natsume.

"That my dear is a wonderful idea!" she exclaimed. "Come on Mikan. Let me show you to your room. I have prepared quite a few clothes that you can take home with you after this." she smiled and held her hand out to Mikan. The shy girl took Mrs. Nogi's hand tentatively and followed her up the stairs.

Once out of ear shot Hotaru turned towards Natsume.

"You idiot! I could have found out something about her!"

"You obviously didn't notice how upset she was. I couldn't just let Ruka's mom continue like that." Natsume growled back.

"I don't care."

"You are heartless."

"And you're not?"

"How could I be heartless?"

"Well let's see, you go on missions that lead to people's death, you don't care that your friends and worried about you, and you haven't contacted your dad in over three years!"

"You know as well as I do that I have no choice."

"Really. You could, you know, not do those things. It can't be that hard to tell the academy that you at least want to talk to your dad."

Natsume bit his lip to keep from exploding on Hotaru. Everything she had said was true and it hurt that it was so.

"You guys, I think we should drop this for now. I mean we found out that Mikan's dad died. Isn't that enough for now?" Ruka commented. Both Natsume and Hotaru glared at him, causing him to shrink back. "Please?"

"Fine." Hotaru said curtly. She gave one last glare at Natsume before storming up the stairs to her own room, leaving Natsume and Ruka to themselves.

"Natsume, you know that she means no harm. It's just annoying her that she know almost nothing about this new girl. And yeah, she can be heartless, but that doesn't mean that she wouldn't do anything to help her friends."

"I know." Natsume muttered. "I'm going to change, what about you?"

"Okay."

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

I thought that my room at the school was amazing, but it was nothing compared to the room that I stood in at that moment. It was larger than the apartment that I shared with my mother not including the closet.

"Well then, here are all of the swimsuit choices. I hope you like one of them." Mrs. Nogi babbled, opening the door to the closet.

"Thanks." I breathed, still shocked by the size of everything. The door behind me closed and I wandered over to the closet. It was then that my pocket buzzed. I reached down, thinking something was wrong before remembering that Hotaru had given me a cell phone. I pulled it out of my pocket and saw that I had one new message.

_So... you freaked yet?_

It was from Tsubasa. I laughed to myself and spent a few minutes figuring out how to type before sending a message back.

_Just a little. This place is amazing. _

I continued to search through the different bathing suits as I talked to Tsubasa. It wasn't long before I found a simple one piece that made me happy. It was a light blue and showed very little skin.

_I found a suit so I have to go now._ I wrote before changing. Once I was done I read the new message I had.

_You should send me a pic _;).

My jaw dropped, not only because of his ridiculous request, but also because I hadn't realized that phones could take pictures. I furiously told him that I would never do something like that as I headed downstairs. I had put on a pair of capris and a t-shirt to cover myself, but I hadn't realized that doing such a thing was frowned upon by the others.

"Mikan you take too long." Hotaru whined. She was wearing a deep amethyst one piece that had a matching knee length skirt. "I mean seriously we have been waiting forever. And why are you wearing regular clothing?"

I hid my eyes. "I don't know." The phone in my hand buzzed again and I glanced at it.

_Please Mikan? I promise I won't show it to anyone else. _My face must have turned crimson because Natsume grabbed the phone from my hand to see what was being said. I tried to protest but the words wouldn't come out.

"What does this person want?" Natsume demanded. I looked away.

"He was just asking for a picture of me in the swim suit I chose, but I told him I couldn't do that." I managed to mumble.

Nastume snorted and tossed me back my phone. I didn't understand why he did that, but I was in no hurry to find out.

"I didn't know you were dating someone." Ruka teased. I blushed a deep red.

"N-no. T-t-tsubasa is just a friend!" I squeaked.

Ruka let out a laugh. "I'm just kidding. You don't need to be embarrassed."

"This is boring. Let's go." I heard Hotaru say behind me. She was indeed bored looking, leaning against the railing with half closed eyes. "We can discuss Mikan's love life later. Right now we have a date with the ocean."

* * *

Ruka and Natsume got in the water almost as soon as we got there, not caring how cold it was, while Hotaru stayed behind in the shade of an umbrella. I watched the three of them, unsure of what to do. I hadn't done any swimming since my father died and I wasn't quite ready to face the waters again.

"Oi, Mikan, get in the water!" Hotaru commanded behind me. I sighed and shook my head.

"I apologize, but I haven't gone swimming in the longest time so..."

"Oh who cares about that. The whole reason why we brought you out here was so you could become friends with us, and that's kinda hard to do when you refuse to swim."

"Sorry..."

I headed over to where Hotaru was sitting, planning on joining her when I was stopped by two arms lifting me in the air. I gasped and realized that Natsume had thrown me over his shoulder and was heading into the water.

I began to struggle but it was like before, no use. He carried me into a pretty deep part of the water, the surface coming up to his waist and dropped me in the water despite the fact that I still had my clothes on.

I struggled under the water for a few seconds before being lifted to the surface by Natsume.

"Sorry princess, but I think it's time you got over your little shy spell." he towered over me, a grin on his face. I blushed again and slid into the water, letting only the top half of my face show. Natsume laughed and grabbed a floaty for me. I muttered a thank before clambering on the raft.

"Are you ever going to stop calling us by our last names?" Ruka queried. I shook my head.

"Why not?" I was startled to hear Hotaru's voice next to me. I hadn't seen her get in the water.

"I don't know." I answered uncertainly. I really didn't. I guess it was uncomfortable for me as calling someone by their first name meant that you were close to them, and I refused to get close to anyone my age, or older.

"Well you should. I'm getting sick of being called Imai." Hotaru commanded. "With those two it's fine," she said, pointing at Ruka and Natsume, "but with you it's not."

I let out a sigh, hoping that the three of them would leave me alone soon.

"I'm sorry, but I can't do it."

Hotaru scowled but gave up and waded through the water back towards the shore, dragging Ruka along with her. Natsume continued to watch me though, his crimson eyes digging into my soul. I shuddered slightly, but tried to not show how uncomfortable I was. Finally Natsume looked away.

"Well it's about lunch time. Let's head back." he grabbed onto the raft and pulled me back towards shore.

* * *

The next two days flew by and before I knew it, it was Sunday. I had to admit that it had been a fun weekend. The three others continued to try and get me to talk to them about my life but I managed to tell them almost nothing. Of course I knew that I couldn't keep that up forever and I was glad when I was told that we would be leaving early on Monday.

It was evening now, I lay in the large king size bed that was in the room I stayed in, wondering how things were going to change from now on. I lay there for hours, trying to sleep, but the wonderful situation would not come to me. Frustrated, I sat up and headed to the balcony. It wasn't far from the ground so I jumped, landing roughly on the sandy ground. I groaned from the pain but continued walking towards the water.

Waves lapped up on the shore. I smiled and stepped into the water. The cool water was a nice contrast to the burning sensation that still haunted my feet from my jump and I became so absorbed in my own little world of happiness that I failed to notice someone come up behind me.

"Can't sleep?"

I turned sharply and saw an amused Natsume standing a few feet away from me.

"Well?" he asked again. I ignored him and turned back towards the ocean. "Really? This is how you're going to treat me? That's cold."

He walked up beside me and looked out to the open sea as well.

"You know, I used to hate talking to people too." he revealed suddenly. I looked over at him. "I wasn't like you, but I didn't have the greatest life as a kid and I hid in a shell, not talking to anyone, hurting those around me. In the end, I had no friends." He took a breath before continuing. "It wasn't until Ruka came to the school that I first realized that talking to people actually helps. That there are people out there who would just listen and not judge me based on things I couldn't control, and I think that's what you need."

I turned and began to walk away from Natsume, fearing that I would begin to cry.

"I know you're hiding something from us, and I have a feeling it has something to do with your dad's death."

At this I couldn't take it anymore. I spun around, tears in my eyes and I began to yell. For the first time in a long time, I actually yelled at someone.

"What do you know about my life? You don't know anything and there is no way you could ever know! Just shut up and leave me alone!" I couldn't control my tears. They flowed down my face like a silent stream. "You act as though my life is just a game. All of you do. There is nothing fun about it, nothing laughable and yet all I am to you guys is a freak show. A goddamn freak show!" I tried to say something else but the words wouldn't form.

Natsume walked towards me, a scared look on his face. It made me angrier.

"How can you compare me to you? You don't even know anything! It's like saying that you know what it's like to be an animal. You can't know!"

"You're right, I can't know, especially if you don't tell anyone what's going on." Natsume explained calmly. He took another step towards me, nearly closing the gap between us. I was still crying, but I didn't seem to be able to say anything more. My throat hurt from the yelling and I felt scared that I had done something wrong again.

Natsume reached out towards me and I cowered away.

"I'm not going to hurt you." Natsume whispered, pulling me towards him. I couldn't tell what he was doing but I tried to get away. "Mikan." he pleaded. I looked up at him. "I swear, I'm not going to hurt you."

For some reason I believed him. I didn't even trust the kids in my special abilities class this much, but the way Natsume was looking down at me, the way he was talking, I felt safe.

"Thank you, Natsume." I mumbled. I could barely see his smile as he tilted my chin up, and kissed me.

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

It was a light kiss, a gentle touch of the lips, and it didn't last long. Natsume pulled away from Mikan, feeling as though he were walking on air. Why he kissed her, he didn't understand, but he was glad he did it.

Mikan seemed to be disoriented, though Natsume wasn't surprised. Anyone would be that way after crying as much as she did. He pulled her into a hug and held her there for the longest time, not caring if Hotaru took a picture of the scene.

Finally, Mikan seemed to have fallen asleep. Natsume picked her up, holding her like a bride and carried her to the back door that he had come out of. It wasn't long before he made it to her room and placed her on the bed, wishing that he could have held her longer.

He sighed and exited the room, closing the door silently.

* * *

The next day was hectic. If Hotaru or Ruka had witnessed what had happened the night before, neither mentioned anything, but Mikan seemed to be in complete shock. Mrs. Nogi helped her get ready, packing clothing for her and what not, but Mikan seemed distant, or at least more so than she normally did.

No one seemed to notice though and the day went on like any normal day. Kind of.

It became obvious later that at least Hotaru had seen what happened the night before and she seemed to make fun of Natsume for it.

"So, have fun last night?" she mocked with a grin. Natsume groaned and ignored her, trying to finish packing. "You certainly seemed happy when you woke up this morning. I wonder what happened." Natsume picked up a book and threw it at Hotaru right as she fled the room. He knew that she would never let him hear the end of this.

The car ride wasn't that bad. Natsume mainly talked to Ruka, Hotaru fiddled with an invention, and Mikan stared out the window. The car had an awkward atmosphere, but no one commented on it.

Finally they got to the school. Mikan was the first out and the three of them didn't see her until school the next day, and even then she avoided them like the plague. For the rest of the week she refused to talk to any of them, causing much anger to gather in Hotaru. She took it out on the boys, testing her new inventions on them and selling embarrassing photos. But it wasn't until that Sunday that anything interesting happened.


	4. Chapter 4

Okay so here's the last chapter of this story. I don't really like it but I doubt I'll get it edited and reposted. It's just too much work for me right now.

So anyway, I have had some fun rewriting this story, even though it was kinda painful. So yeah.

There is something I want all of you who have read this to know. Almost everything that has to do with abuse in this story, it's not just made up. It actually happened, whether it be to me, or my sister. Yes that's right, in case you haven't noticed by my irritation I have been abused by my mother. All of the things that were said by Yuka, all the things she did I have either witnessed or been a victim of. That's why I had such issues with the original. For some one who has experienced abuse to read something that is so fake, it hurts.

But there are some things I want to clear up. For instance, after Mikan is hospitalized and her mother is there worried about her, there is nothing unreal about that. I remember the countless days after my mom had hurt me that she would feel so bad about it. Of course she completely forgot about or denied it later on but still... Also Mikan's explosion on her mom. It actually does happen. Getting fed up to the point of snapping is something that happens and happens often.

So anyway, that's really all I have to say about this story and I hope you enjoyed my rewrite of it. Please check out my other stories and review Review REVIEW!!!!! Thank you.

~Sunechirei

Some how I had managed to avoid Natsume, Ruka and Hotaru for the entire week. I really had nothing against them, other than the fact that they had spent three days trying to get me to talk about my past, pushing me to do things I really didn't want to do, and Natsume had even kissed me.

I turned red at the thought and headed down the hallways of the school. It was Sunday again and I needed to talk to Mr. Narumi about a homework assignment he had given out on Friday. I reached his door and was about to knock when I heard his voice behind me.

"Oh! Mikan. Your mother was looking for you. I think she went to your room so you might want to head over there."

"Um, sir, I actually have a question first..."

"I can answer that later. Right now you should go see your mom. You haven't seen her in almost two weeks right?"

"Yeah."

"So go. I'll be here later tonight if you still need your question answered. Kay?" He smiled at me. I showed a small grin in return and bowed. He headed way but I stood at his office door, reluctant to head to my room. I didn't know what my mother had in store for me. I knew she would be mad about last week, but there was nothing I could really do but face it.

With a sigh I headed towards my room. The beautiful day seemed to be laughing at me, mocking me for what I knew was about to happen. Once the dorm building was in sight, I ran as fast as I could, which I admit was not very fast, and entered the building, hoping that no one had seen me. Reluctantly, I trudged up the six flights of stairs to my floor, hoping that nothing was going to happen, though I knew that it would never be that way.

My mother was standing by my door when I arrived. She looked like a normal mother waiting to see her daughter. I put on a smile and walked over to the room.

"Hey Mom." I said. She glanced over at me. Though she didn't speak a word, her eyes told the story.

Pain.

Hurt.

Anger.

Disappointment.

I knew that I was doomed. Pulling out my key I turned to my door and unlocked it, letting myself and my mother into my room. Nothing in my room had changed since she had been here last, but my mother still wandered around my room, observing everything in it.

"Mom?" I ventured, wondering if she was going to even talk to me.

"Where were you last week?" she asked in a raspy voice. It sounded as though she had been crying.

"A few people in my class took me to one of their houses." I began in a murmur. "I tried to refuse but I didn't really have a choice. I didn't tell you because I knew you would be busy."

"So you think you deserve to have fun do you?" She turned to face me, an unreadable expression on her face. "I traveled here to see you, only to find that you weren't here. Do you know how that made me feel?"

I froze up again. She was mad, madder than I had seen her be in a long time. Not since I was in elementary school.

"No word, no nothing. Not a single peep for two weeks, so I come here today and you aren't even waiting for me." she shook her head. "This isn't how I raised you. I raised you to be a respectful young lady. Someone who cared about her family and would never do something like this, you horrible, horrible gir-"

"No you didn't." I muttered. My mom stopped talking and watched me, her cold eyes piercing into me.

"Excuse me?" she asked dangerously. I took a deep breath and knew I was going to regret this.

"You didn't raise me to be that way. You didn't even raise me, and I am _not_ a horrible person!" With each word I got bolder, and my voice got louder. "How can you say that I'm a horrible person when you are the one who has blamed me for everything, the one who has hurt me for no reason?"

My mother took a dangerous step towards me and I cowered away, but kept talking.

"You always wanted me to be perfect, but I can never be that way. You call yourself my mother yet you don't even try to be one. Why? What did I do?"

"You killed my husband, that's what! You killed him and you act as though you did nothing wrong!"

"That's because I didn't! I didn't kill him. I didn't! I didn't!" tears began to stream down my face and fear filled my heart. "If there is anyone you should blame it's the drunk driver for hitting him, or the hospital for not being able to save him! Or maybe even yourself, for not being able to stop him from leaving your side."

I wanted to say more but my mother slapped me, stopping my rant.

"How dare you blame this on other people! Especially me!" she slapped me again, this time hard enough that I began to bleed. I could feel the single cut running down my face.

"You deserve it. You, you..." I couldn't continue. My mother charged up to me and shoved me against the bookcase.

What happened next was a blur. I heard my mother call my name, then excruciating pain.

All went black.

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

Natsume lay stretched out on his bed reading a book of manga. He hated Sundays. Everyone went to go see their parents and he was left alone. It wasn't like he didn't want to see his father, it was more like if he did the school would consider his father Natsume's guardian and then he would have to pay for Natsume's tuition.

That would be financial suicide for his father as a painter didn't make much.

Feeling sorry for himself, Natsume sat up and began to head out to the forest area of campus when he heard yelling. Stopping, he listened closely and managed to make out Mikan's voice. It was muddled so he couldn't hear what was going on but he was worried and went to go see what was going on.

Mikan's room was right next to Natsume's so he went over and stood in front of the door about to knock when he heard a loud crash and a woman calling Mikan's name.

Not waiting for an answer, Natsume burst into the room and saw Mikan lying on the floor, blood darkening her hair.

"What..." Natsume stammered.

The woman who Natsume assumed was Mikan's mom looked up at him, fear in her eyes.

"What happened?"

"Mikan, she... she... she fell and hit crashed into the bookshelf. I don't know-" the woman began to cry.

"Calm down." Natsume soothed. "Let's get her to the campus hospital. They'll know what to do."

He hurried over to Mikan and picked her up, the mom fretting over her daughter. The trek to the hospital was long and hard. Students and their parents watched in shock and horror as Natsume carried Mikan to the small clinic. When they got there, there were a few doctors and nurses waiting for them.

"Someone must have run ahead and told them we were coming." Natsume explained to Mikan's mom. She nodded and clenched the bottoms of her jacket.

"Mr. Hyuuga, please bring Ms. Sakura in." a doctor commanded. Natsume recognized him as Hotaru's brother, Subaru. Natsume nodded and followed him into the hospital.

It wasn't long before they managed to get Mikan into a room and began to stitch her up. While this was going on a doctor was talking to Natsume and Mikan's mom.

"What happened?" he asked pulling out a notebook and pen. Natsume looked over at the woman but she seemed to be in too much shock.

"I don't exactly know..." Natsume began. "I was in the room next to Mikan when I heard yelling. I wanted to know what it was about so I went over there and heard a loud crash. Confused I opened the door and saw Mikan unconscious in her mother's arms. And there was blood. A lot of blood."

The doctor nodded, writing down everything Natsume said.

"Ma'am, I'm going to need you to talk. First, what is your name?"

"Yuka. Yuka Sakura. I'm Mikan's mom." she muttered. "I don't know what happened, I really don't. We were arguing and then she tripped backwards into the bookshelf..." she trailed off, her voice trembling.

"Wait, what about Mikan?"

Natsume turned around and saw one of Mikan's special class friends, Tsubasa.

"She got hurt." Natsume replied curtly.

"How?"

Natsume was about to respond when a nurse came out of Mikan's room and told them that it was okay to go and see her. Yuka stood up and hurried over to the room.

"Who's that?" Tsubasa asked. Natsume told him. "Her mother? No don't let her go in there!" he yelled.

"What are you talking about?" Natsume questioned. "That's her mom."

"Yeah, a mom that abuses her daughter!"

No one moved or spoke. Natsume thought about what Tsubasa had just said and suddenly everything made sense.

The way Mikan acted, why she never talked to anyone, why she wore the winter uniform in the summer, all of it.

The doctor who was taking notes called over one of the guards and said something to them, causing them to charge into Mikan's room and drag Yuka out of it.

"What's going on! Let me see my daughter!" she screamed.

"Miss Sakura, this young boy has told us that you abuse your daughter. Is this true?"

"A-abuse? What nonsense is that? I have never hurt her."

"Stop lying you old hag." Tsubasa hissed. "I've seen the marks that you left. I saw Mikan break down in tears when she told us what was going on. Don't lie!"

"I'm not-"

"I apologize Ma'am, but we can't let you see your daughter until this is resolved, please leave." the doctor informed. Yuka pulled away from the guards, her entire face stoic. She looked back at her daughter's room before storming out of the hospital.

Natsume watched her go. It was weird seeing a mother leave like that, but he didn't have long to think about it because a nurse came into the main part of the hall and informed everyone that Mikan was awake.

Natsume felt his heart flutter and he began to walk towards her when someone called out to him.

"Natsume what's going on?"

Turning around Natsume saw Ruka and Hotaru hurrying towards him. They eventually caught up to him, panting.

"We heard that you were carrying a bleeding Mikan to the hospital. What happened?" Ruka asked.

"I'm not really sure." Natsume confessed. "I know that Mikan got really hurt but now I don't know how it happened."

"What do you mean now?"

"Well at first her mother said that she tripped and hit her head on a bookcase, but crazy dude here claims that Mikan has been abused."

"It's not a claim." Tsubasa explained. "It's true. She told me.

Ruka and Hotaru exchanged glances.

"I'm serious! But that's not important right now, we need to go and talk to Mikan!" he huffed, turning around and heading into Mikan's room. Natsume, Ruka and Hotaru followed after him.

~%~%~%~%~%~%~

I stared out the window, the bandage on my head reminding me what had happened. I didn't know how I got to that hospital, or even if it was Sunday still, but I knew two things:

My mother wasn't here.

They knew.

The door to my room opened and I glanced over to see Tsubasa enter. He had a goofy grin on his face that told me he had told the doctors that my mom abused me. I was angry at him, yet at the same time, relieved.

"Hey Mikan." Tsubasa chided gently. "How are you doing?" he walked over to the chair that was beside my bed and sat down in it.

"I'm fine." I muttered. "I just don't know what to do now."

"You know I had to tell them, right?"

I looked over at my friend. He had a pitiful look on his face with his wide eyes and pouted lips. I sighed and glanced back at the window right as three more people entered. The three people I didn't want to see.

"I know. But you did promise." I accused.

"So it's true." Hotaru whispered. "That's what you've been hiding from us." I nodded slowly, unsure of what to say or do. Now that the three of them knew, I would be treated differently and I really didn't want that.

"Why didn't you just tell us?" Ruka asked. I looked over at him, confused. "I mean it was kinda obvious that we were worried about you and we were trying to help but you didn't tell us. Why?"

I opened my mouth to respond but was interrupted.

"She couldn't. To say something is wrong is the hardest thing to do in this kind of situation."

My face turned red at the sound of Natsume's voice.

"What he said." I mumbled. Natsume snorted at my reaction but said nothing else. No one spoke for a while. I tired to get used to the idea that people knew about my secret, but it didn't work. Suddenly the door slid open again.

A man I didn't recognize walked in. He looked around the room, his eyes landing on each person in the room at least once. Finally he looked at me.

"Mikan Sakura?" I nodded. "I am the high school principal. I need to know what happened to you."

Everyone was staring at me intently, waiting for my answer. I shrunk back in my bed.

"Nothing happened. It was an accident."

"Ms. Sakura, it's okay, you can tell me what happened."

"I told you that nothing did!"

"Alright then, is it true that your mother abuses you?"

I didn't know what to do. If I told the truth, who knew what would happen to my mother, but if I lied, I didn't know what would happen to me. So I took the chance. I said something that I never thought I would.

"Yes."

* * *

I had to stay in the hospital for the next four days. I didn't get many visitors, though that was okay with me. A few people visited me everyday however. Natsume was one of them, though I couldn't figure out why. On the last day of my hospitalization, I asked.

"I don't know." he replied. "I guess you could say I've fallen for you." he grinned and I blushed.

"Are you serious?" It was the first time I heard a guy say that to me. I really had no idea what to do.

"Who knows." he laughed.

It was about then that he declared himself to be my boyfriend. It made me smile to know that someone could love me. After that things went pretty smoothly. I still talked very little and I never told anyone about that day, though it was hard when I had girls trying to get me to talk about how I got Natsume to date me.

I never had an answer for them, mainly because I didn't know myself.

Then there was my mom. It wasn't until I was a senior in high school that I saw her again. She had come to find me one afternoon while I was off campus. She was different. I don't know how to explain it but it seemed that she had changed a lot since I had seen her last.

We exchanged almost no words, but she did apologize to me. She told me that she was getting therapy and that she was sorry for all of the things she did to me, and asked for forgiveness. I never answered her. She is still waiting for my answer but I don't know if I can ever forgive her. It would be the best thing for me to do, but I feel as though she isn't my mother anymore.

~#~#~#~#~#~#~

I took a deep breath, relieved that I had finished my story. My therapist sat across from my, her pen scribbling furiously.

"Well, Mikan, that is certainly interesting. It's been five years since that time right?"

"Yeah."

"How are you now? Do you think you would forgive your mother if she asked you again?"

I closed my eyes, trying to imagine such a scene happening again. It wouldn't come.

"I think, I would." I said calmly. "But she could never be my mom."

"Why not?"

I smiled. "Why would she be?"

* * *

It was late when I exited my therapist's office. I walked slowly, thinking about all of the things I had talked about today. It had been hard for me back then to get close to people, though now it was easy. I guess aging five years does help.

I finally made it home. It wasn't really a home, more of an apartment I shared with Natsume. When I opened the door I got a surprise. There were a few people over, some of my friends.

"What's going on?" I asked Anna, a girl I had met in my junior year. She laughed.

"We just got the news! Ruka finally proposed!"

My jaw dropped. "Really! Took him long enough. Haven't they been dating since middle school?"

"Yeah. That's why all of us are so excited. Though Natsume doesn't seem to be." she winked and I rolled my eyes.

"Thanks Anna. I'll go talk to him." I made my way into my room where I wasn't surprised to see my boyfriend lying on my bed. "Pouty much?" I asked teasingly. He grunted and sat up.

"It's too crowded."

"Really?" I grabbed his wrists and pulled him off the bed. "Come on. Let's go congratulate them." we walked out to the main part of the apartment. It wasn't hard to find the couple, but it took forever to finally get to talk to them.

"Congrats!" I cheered hugging Hotaru. She hugged me back and grinned.

"It's hard to believe how much you've changed."

I looked away sheepishly and someone added to that statement.

"Yeah Mikan. You have changed. Why were you so weird when you first transferred to Alice Academy?"

Everyone stopped talking and looked at me expectantly. I felt nervous but was comforted by Natsume's arms as the wrapped around my waist.

"I guess I never did tell you guys did I?" I began. Choruses of nos answered me. "Well, to be blunt, I had been abused."


	5. Special prologue and author's note

**If you've read the previous four chapters, please read all of this as well :) It's mostly an author's note, but there is a small section of a story in there as well. :)**

**Wow. Just wow. It's been almost a year since I posted the first chapter of this. It's amazing how much a single person can change in a year's time, agreed? I think so. I mean, I went from innocent little 15 year old girl who was still trying to deal with the shitty emotional wreck left behind by her step-mother, to an almost 17 year old young woman who's still trying to untangle the emotional knot left behind by 11 years of abuse**

**….**

**Okay, I take it back, people don't change _that_ much in a year ^.^**

**But seriously, I was surprised by a lot of things when I went back and read through this story, not only by the immaturity of my author's notes, but to the writing itself, which isn't good, in all reality, and truly doesn't show as much emotion and horror that surrounds a child abuse victim. I've noticed that people don't see how much it affects the psyche of a child to be told from the age of three that your not able to love, or that everything bad is your fault. Being hit for no reason as well seems to bypass witnesses of abuse victims. They think, "yeah, the child got hit. It's bad, sure, the child is hurt," but they don't seem to realize how long it will stay with a person, child or not.**

**I didn't even realize this until it's been a little over two years since I screamed bloody murder at my step-mom and ran away from her house, never to talk to her again. See, yeah. Once or twice on the street while she was in her car, but the last words I said to her were, "No! I don't want to hear you telling me I'm a horrible person! I'm not!"**

**I was such an adorable 14 year old, don't you agree?**

**Anyway, that's not the point. See, even as an abuse victim, I didn't see half of my own physical reactions, and I didn't know a lot of things about depression and what not until _after_ I tried to kill myself with sleeping pills and ended up in a mental hospital for Thanksgiving -.- Fun week...**

**And the thing is, most people don't know. They see what's on the outside, the people's shell, and they think that's what goes on in their head. So I figured, why not use this as an excuse to explain a few things, as well as show through some good old fashioned rewriting the story. In a different way, of course.**

**But first, a part of the story that's very important; PTSD. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Now, I know what you're thinking, "PTSD? Isn't that some disorder people in the military get?" You would be correct. Kinda. Anyone can get PTSD after a very traumatic experience, whether it be a car crash, a death of a family member, abuse, war, etc. When you have PTSD, you tend to be hypersensitive to things like sound, touch, words, and even people. A lot of times you have anxiety and depression, nightmares about what happened, constant. For me, this comes out in my shaking. I shake all the time, sometimes uncontrollably, others as if I'm having a sugar rush. It also shows every time I flinch. If someone comes near me, if I hear a loud noise, an item comes near me, someone raises their voice, I flinch as if I'm going to be hit. I know they won't hurt me, and that nothing bad's going to happen, but I still think it will.**

**Mikan doesn't have this so much in this story because she's in the middle of her abusive situation, but another character does; Yuka, Mikan's mother.**

**Particularly in Crazyanimelover's fic, but even in mine, Yuka is made out to be a villain, a person who you can't feel sorry for, but that's because it was from Mikan's POV. I think it would be interesting to see this story written from Yuka's POV. She's suffered as well; her husband was killed right before her eyes as he tried to save her child. If that's not traumatic, I don't know what is. So the first scene I'm going to write is from Yuka's POV. Surprising, I know. But it may show a bit of her psyche, and help people realize; mother's don't hurt their children for no reason.**

* * *

"Why would you hit Mikan?"

My brain consisted of nothing but scattered thoughts when my therapist asked me this, but the question brought me back to reality, drawing my attention away from the fluttering birds outside the window. No matter how wonderful their chirps sounded to my ears, and their colorful feathers appeared to my eyes, the question seemed overpowering, deadly, almost.

_"Why would you hit Mikan?"_

A good question. Why would I hit my own daughter, my flesh and blood, my baby girl. She did nothing wrong. Never. Perfect grades, didn't raise her voice against me, kept the house clean, cooked meals... the daughter all of my "friends" wanted.

"Yuka?"

Slowly, my eyes traveled to my therapist. Tired eyes. Just moving them made me feel as though liquid lead covered the lids. Liquid lead... lids... Those words tugged forward a memory I tried to forget a long time ago. Forcing Mikan to sit in a room with walls freshly painted, next to the can lacking it's lid. I stood by the window and watched her attempt to cover her nose with her ragged pink dress. It made me sick to my stomach just thinking about it.

"How could I have done that to her?" I whispered, curling my legs to my chest, a single tear threatening to form in my eye.

"What did you say?" My therapist leaned forward eagerly, her hand shaking almost excitedly at my revelation. No doubt she heard what I said; I didn't feel like repeating myself.

"I miss the outdoors," I said, though the lie seemed quite obvious, even to me. It sounded nothing like what I muttered before. The therapist let out a sigh and leaned back against her chair.

"Yuka, you know that you'll never get out of here if you don't cooperate with us," she warned, "I know you want to leave here; all of our patients do, but you're going to have to talk to us about what you did to your daughter. It's why you're in here, after all." Ah yes, why they placed me in a mental hospital. A place for crazy people. I guess that makes me crazy.

A sudden movement outside caught my eye; a young couple, walking through the park with laughter showing in every way possible. It reminded me of home. Of happiness. Of _him._

"I still dream about _him_ you know." Despite my shaking voice, I didn't miss a beat. After all, I just told this story yesterday, and the day before that, and the day before that; every day since coming to this clinic. "The dream starts out nice. We're on a date, before Mikan was born, eating ice cream together, laughing, having fun. Then she's there, cradled in _his_ arm, asleep. I'm jealous. _He's_ different with her than he is with me, but jealous of my own baby? That's not fair to the child." I laughed at this point, giggling like a mad woman, and the story changed slightly, "The rest of the dream makes me angry. She's older now, five, and wanting ice cream. I want to scream at her that ice cream is what adults eat, and that only _he_ and I can eat it; it's special to us. But that would upset _him._

"So instead I let her hand go. On purpose. I let it go on purpose you know. But I didn't know she would run off after the truck. I didn't know she was going to be so stupid and run into the street! Then there's blood. Blood. Blood, blood! Everywhere I look there's blood, and _he's_ laying on the ground, drenched in it. I want to scream. Oh how I want to scream, but Mikan's hands are at my throat, and she's smiling. She wants me dead! I know she wants me dead! How can she not want me dead?"

The therapist wanted to know why I hit Mikan? To protect myself! If I didn't do it, she would kill me. Just like she did to _him_.

As they dragged me out of the room, screaming, kicking, sobbing, I managed to add, "She killed him! She killed my love! She's not my baby, not my daughter! She... she... she killed him!"

Even to this day, I don't believe it.

* * *

**Eerie, isn't it.**

**So, starting in a few days, I'm going to be rewriting this story, not for you guys, but for me. You can read it if you want, review if you please, but just know; I'm doing this as a kind of closure for myself, but it's a fanfic that's going to help me with my writing style. So, please enjoy (if you read), and I hope you guys will see some insight to the world of abuse.**


	6. New chapter 1

**Okay, this took me longer to write than I thought, but oh well. It's here now. Whatevs. **

**I got some very interesting reviews for the last chapter, so I want to discuss them. Here. Now. :) (Before hand, sorry if I butcher your names...)  
**

**First, to SweetKaiariChan: I'm not actually sweet, and I'm not okay. PTSD, paranoia, agoraphobia, anthropophobia, depression... I may be bi-polar, I fit all but one symptom of paranoid schizophrenia, and I have anxiety and panic attacks almost daily. I can act fine on here, but if you met me in real life... . Sorry if I sound irritated... to everyone...**

**Second, Crazyanimelover, yes, the original author of this story. When I think about it, the parent is NEVER the villain. There's always something psychologically wrong with a mother who would hurt her own daughter, her own child, flesh and blood. **

**Third; SweetieSakura. I think personal experience is what helped me add more feeling into the story. But, who knows, really...**

**Then, to the anonymous reviewer, The Dreamer. No. Just... just no. Your review didn't make me feel better, or help me in some way, it just made me pissed off. I'm sorry, but it's true. You don't know my pain. You don't. Telling me how wonderful your family is made me want to cry because it made me realize that I can never have a normal family. My mother's dead, my father is an engineer who for years, did nothing about the abusive woman he married. For 11 fucking years he helped her abuse me, hit me, yelled at me, hit me so hard I couldn't sit down. Then we get to my brother, who I love dearly, but it's so hard to deal with an autistic 18 year old who acts like he's 8. My sister as well is as screwed up as I am. She hates coming home. She hates being around our dad. One of my step-brothers won't talk to me, the other moved as far away from our house as possible. Don't tell me to find my innershine, or that I'm cool, or that I'm "telling my life story," because I'm not. I'm not. The only similarity between my life and this story is the abuse. And even then it's not that similar. I found your review to be very insulting. I guess you meant well, but please, don't say things like that again.**

**And finally, to natsumeslover. I know that people put on smiles, and no one can tell. I was one of those kids. Do you know how long it took my best friend of nine years to figure out that I'd been abused? He didn't. I told him. No one knew. **

***sigh* I think that's all... sorry about the rant, and if I seemed irritated, sorry. A lot of crap has happened to me recently, so... Anyway, thanks to everyone who reviewed (though it's interesting that my other fanfic gets maybe one review a chapter and it has more chapter -.-) and I hope you... um... enjoy? this chapter of my weird ass rewrite. It's going to be different, and at the end it's a bit rushed. I was kind of sick of this chapter. .**

**So, here's chapter 1. :)  
**

_

* * *

"Daddy! Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!" The small girl took hold of her father's hand, tugging it down excitedly. "Daddy! I want ice cream!" Hand shaking from excitement, she pointed across the street where a sparkly white truck rested. Though the siren was off, the colorful pictures of ice cream brands and advertisements gave the truck away for what it really was; a haven for children. Of course, all of the children playing in the park, surrounded the truck now, waiting for the delicious treat sitting inside._

_ "Now now, Mikan," the father said smoothly as he leaned down to her level with a small smile, "it's too far away and we don't have any more time to get the ice cream. Can you wait until we get home?"_

_ Small, five year old lips turned downward as Mikan pouted. She stomped her small foot once and squealed, "But it's hot!" Almost to prove her point, the small child grabbed the bottom of her lavender dress and shook it viciously, fanning herself. Her father let out a hearty chuckle and his hands moved to his daughter's cheeks, nuzzling her nose. _

_ Watching this display of affection from not far away stood a young woman with crossed arms and a scowl etched on her otherwise perfect face. She clearly did not approve of the joy radiating off the child and her father._

_ "Mikan, I know it's hot," she said, "but it'll be cooler when we get home." She moved towards the little girl and snatched up one of the tiny hands, putting on a smile. "Now, we should head home before it gets too late, don't you agree?" Her eyes traveled to those of the man, who's face was covered by a blissful expression. He only nodded._

_ Resigned, Mikan looked at her feet. "Okay, Mommy."_

_ The mother's smile became softer. She let go of her daughter's hand, thinking all of was safe, but suddenly the truck started up and headed towards the family._

_ Mikan's eyes lit up and she jumped excitedly. "Mommy, Daddy! It's coming this way! It's coming this way!" She giggled and turned away from them. "Now we have time!" She took off towards the truck, her little feel beating against the ground. The voice of her father barely caught her hearing, but she ignored it, instead heading into the streets. _

_ "No! Mikan!" _

_ Mikan stopped in her tracks, hearing her father's yell, and the screeching of a car._

_ Something connected with her body and she was sent flying. _

_ Letting out a screech, the small girl broke her fall, causing pain to swell in her hands and knees. She pushed herself off the pavement, shaking from the pain, and turned towards the place she was before, eyes widening horribly. A crowd appeared around her, muttering, yelling for an ambulance, screaming that someone should bloody do something._

_ Blood._

_ That's all Mikan saw. That, and her father's body, lifeless on the ground, in a pool of red liquid. He didn't move, she couldn't see his face; only his blood.

* * *

_

Cold sweat drenched my clothes. My body was convulsing viciously, but I couldn't figure out why. I was scared; absolutely terrified, and the reason for it was escaping me. Sudden flashes of my dream reminded me why.

My stomach turned, sending a stinging bile up my throat, and I hurriedly threw off my covers and stumbled to the small bathroom across from my bed, covering my mouth. Nearly killing myself, I managed to throw open the door and make it to the toilet before my body gave in and I puked, not caring if my hair got in the way.

A tingling sensation trickled from my fingertips to my shoulders, and from my stomach to the rest of my body. My breathing was labored as I rested my head against my arms, trying hard to keep another wave of nausea from attacking, as well as tears from falling.

It had been a long time since I'd had that dream. A long time since I'd seen the blood swirling around my childhood body, staining my dress red, my hands crimson, my thoughts black.

Just thinking about it sent me into another frenzy of panic, and I heaved again.

Nothing came out this time.

Hoping the worst was over, I leaned away from the toilet, the stench making me feel horrid, and against the wall behind me, trying to control my labored breathing, to calm down before I had to leave the room and deal with my life.

_In, and out, in and out. Calm down Mikan, calm down,_ I thought, placing a hand over my eyes, blocking the light shining through the window. It made me feel worse. The light of day brought happiness to those who bathed in it; it brought joy to the people who lived their lives in the streaming sunshine. If only it could bring me those things.

I sat against the wall for a time that seemed long and almost strenuous during my failing attempt to calm down. After a time, my breathing did calm slightly, and the shaking stopped, but every time I thought of my father laying in that pool, not moving, the feeling of nausea came again.

I wanted to stay there forever, not think about anything, but when my alarm went off in the room next to me, the thoughts of school, breakfast, and my mother flooded through me. Forcing myself to stand could easily compare to trying to get a lion not to kill for food. I let out a low chuckle at the comparison.

Shaking again, I managed to stand with a lot of difficulty, wondering if I should tell my mother about throwing up, but I quickly dismissed that thought. Guessing her reaction could only be an unrealistic impossibility. She may tell me I need to stay home from school and rest, or she may say that if I don't buck up and stop being such a wimp, getting anywhere in life would be so out of my reach that going to the moon could be considered easy.

_You're just going to have to deal with it for now,_ I thought, placing my pale hands on the sink counter, and looking in the mirror. I didn't like what I saw.

Dark bags stood out against the rest of my pale, sallow face, highlighting the boring brown eyes that watched my every move accusingly. My stringy, honey brown hair hung in oily clots against my cheeks, and a thought of showering ran through my head. I giggled. No one would care if I looked good; the point of making myself pretty seemed ridiculous. However, the last time I showered was a while ago, and I assumed the teachers would start to get curious. They already wondered why I wore my winter uniform all the time.

Laughter escaped my chapped lips, and I glanced down at my arms. Pale scars covered nearly every inch of skin exposed by the gray tank top, some self-inflicted, others caused by one of my mother's tantrums. The ones I gave myself, mostly on the lower arm, stood out along some of the other scars, seeing as they were newer, redder, and mostly cuts rather than bruises. Mom never cut me on purpose. When I was younger I would get cuts from her if she threw glass at me, but that didn't happen very often anymore.

It was then I noticed a gash in my arm that I missed the night before after my mother freaked on me. Right below my shoulder, a thin, blood crusted slash; straight, somewhat neat, and encircled by a dark purple bruise and a layer of brown crust. It amazed me that this went unnoticed last night. It looked painful.

This got me to take a shower. Someone might have noticed if there was blood staining my uniform, and I knew that putting a band aid on my skin without cleaning it could get the wound infected. Easiest way to clean something as bad as that; take a shower.

So I stripped quickly, and turned on the water of my shower, debating which I wanted; hot or cold. In the end, I went with hot water, not really in the mood to possibly catch a cold. The water felt nice. It was refreshing in a way, like the sin and pain of my life was being scalded from my body and draining away in a nice, small hole.

But it brought back memories I didn't wish to recall.

Mom tried to drown me once. When I was maybe six or seven. She came into my bathroom while I played in the bath water, and she pushed me under. I don't know how long I stayed underneath the water, struggling against my mother's grasp, but just when I felt my life slipping away, she let me go, and I came up spluttering. I'd barely caught my breath before she pushed me under again.

Four times this was repeated. Four times she tried to kill me.

Finally, she let me go, and as I sat their, gasping for breath, tears streaming down my eyes, she leaned towards me with a smile. I flinched away, trying to get away, but she only placed a hand on my shoulder and a kiss on the top of my head.

"Don't go to bed with your hair wet," she warned in a motherly tone, "you might catch a cold."

The next time I took a bath, I locked the door.

It happened again a few years later, but she didn't actually hurt me that time. Only scared me, and now I can't take a shower without fear of her barging in on me.

Even as I turned off the water and stumbled out of the shower, toweling off my hair, I wondered when she would come in and tell me that I needed to get out of the bathroom, even though she was probably still asleep. Tugging on my school uniform, I listened carefully for her, knowing that any second she could wake up from any noise I made. Grabbing my school bag and leaving my room, my eyes wandered to her closed door.

To think that a monster was sleeping in their sent chills through my body.

Quickly, I grabbed something to eat and headed out of my apartment, not wishing to run into Mom.

Sitting in my classroom seemed easily comparable to a suicide attempt. Painful, pointless, with a small glimmer of hope on the other side. No one ever talked to me, not even the teachers, and class work was just annoying. Sometimes I wondered if the school just wanted all students to suffer for being kids, rather than wanting to help us.

My fourth class always seemed to be the worst. The class just before lunch, when all the students in my class became riled up and never stop talking. If my teacher wasn't such a sissy and could actually control the students, than it wouldn't be as bad, but she seemed unable to keep any student from talking.

Today was no different. At first, at least. However, the phone suddenly rang in the back of the class, dragging the teacher away from the front of the room. For some reason, this shut the entire class up. It was slightly nice, though disturbing at the same time, and when the teacher came back in, we were all in for a surprise.

"Mikan Sakura?"

My head immediately shot up from the book I was reading, confused. They were calling me? The last time I'd been called to the school office... well, let's just say the ended up with me being scratched across the face.

"Mikan Sakura, they need you in the principal's office."

A shiver of fear trickled up my spine, and slowly, I stood up. All around me there was whispering. Everyone around me turned in their seats, probably confused as to who "Mikan Sakura" was. I never talked, after all, so my name was never said, and no one knew it was me. If they asked, of course, they would know, but they weren't that curious about it.

"They said to take all of your stuff with you," my teacher muttered, looking almost as confused by the situation as I felt. Shrugging, I grabbed my bag and almost literally dashed out of the room, all of the eyes that lingered on me were making me a bit uneasy.

Walking down the hallway helped calm my nerves, so when I finally reached the door leading to the principal's office, my hand no longer shook, and my breathing became calm again, like nothing scary was going to happen to me, though I was still convinced something would. Bad things happened to those who got called to the principal's office; that was just common knowledge.

"Miss Sakura, we're not going to bite, you can come in," the receptionist at the front desk said sweetly. She was smiling up at me, but the smile seemed false, like she wasn't actually sure if things would be alright.

The fear returned.

Slowly, ever so slowly, I opened the door to the office, and slipped inside. Despite the fact that my eyes were turned downwards, never leaving my feet, I could see everyone in the room. Not in clear detail, of course, but they were still there. The principal and vice-principal behind the desk, two mysterious men standing on either side of my principal, watching me intently, and my mother, sitting quietly with her hands folded neatly on her lap.

I gulped, not sure what was going on, or how I should react to the people there.

"Miss Sakura, thank you for coming," the principal muttered, wiping his brow, "Please, have a seat." My eyes turned upwards just as he motioned towards the chair next to Mom. When I didn't move from the door, the man laughed and stood nervously. "Or you can stay there. That works as well."

No one spoke, or moved for at least a minute. Everyone was observing me, save Mom who seemed oblivious to my presence. I myself watched the two mysterious men carefully, curious and scared to know who they were. They seemed to be polar opposites from each other; one relaxed, blond hair hanging in shaggy waves, blue eyes shining with excitement and amusement, the other standing politely with a cold expression. This man's black hair nearly blended with his black clothing and deep purple mask. Despite their differences, however, it was obvious these two men worked together, just by the comforting air surrounding them.

The nausea from this morning returned.

Finally, after everyone finished observing everyone, the blond man chuckled. "Well, aren't we a happy bunch," he joked, smiling widely. "This doesn't have to be so depressing, you know." Every word he said was laced with a calm aura, sweet words that could make ice melt in an instant. It affected me like that; calming me down and releasing me from all my fear and tension.

_This... this is nice._

"My name is Narumi," the blond continued, extending his hand towards Mom. "I'm a high school teacher at Alice Academy."

_Alice Academy?_ I pressed back against the door, the calmness gone in an instant.

Known for it's strict visitation rules, Code of Conduct, and curriculum, Alice Academy has been called the most prestigious school in all of Japan. It was nearly impossible to get into that school without knowing "the right people." Rich people scared me.

Mom seemed to have similar thoughts to mine. "Alice Academy? Why are you here, and what does it have to do with me and my daughter?"

She wouldn't even address me by name; how predictable of her.

"Your daughter is a potential genius, Mrs. Sakura." It was the man in black who spoke this time. "We want her in our school."

_Potential genius?_ I had to laugh at this. Quietly, of course. No one in the room heard me. I couldn't possibly be a genius. The only reason I got such high scores was from all my studying and lack of a social life. Of course, the fact that if I got anything lower than a perfect score, Mom would usually hit me. Not all the time, but usually.

"I think you're mistaken, Mr..."

"Serio."

"Mr. Serio. My daughter can't possibly be a genius."

The fact that my own mother would deny such a possibility so quickly... well, let's just say it certainly did nothing for my confidence.

"Mrs. Sakura," the blond, Narumi, cooed in his silky voice, "your Mikan's test scores say otherwise. If I remember correctly, she's been the top in her class for over five years, _and_ she scored in the top one hundred students for the entirety of Japan. That's difficult to do."

Oh how I wished to tell him he was mistaken, and that the only reason for those stats was because I studied day in and day out to keep my mind off of things. Off of certain people. But I didn't. Maybe a part of me didn't actually want to argue. Maybe a small piece of my brain was telling me that this could easily be a good thing.

Maybe, I wanted to escape from my mother.

"But-" Mom argued, gripping the side of her chair. Narumi interrupted her.

"We're giving your daughter a huge opportunity. She would be getting a full scholarship, something that very few students are granted, she would be surrounded by hundreds of other kids like herself-" I doubted that, "-and she would be getting the best education Japan can offer." He smiled at Mom, sliding onto the principal's desk. "You _have_ to consider this."

Mom was speechless.

But there was something strange about the way she acted, almost like she had some kind of spell cast over her. It made me very curious, but I still didn't say anything.

On the other hand, Mom had begun stuttering, spouting out complete nonsense that sent Narumi into a small fit of laughter. Or, I would describe it as a fit of laughter. Probably, anyone else would have just said he chuckled, but I couldn't help but think he was being malicious, mocking, almost.

When his eyes made contact with mine, I knew I had been right.

"Mrs. Sakura, have you reconsidered?" Narumi questioned, still smiling. "If not, we can come back another time, when you're not as stressed out-"

"No," Mom muttered, "I'm not stressed out. You can go ahead and take her. She should be in an environment with people who are like her. Right? If she really is a genius..."

Mom was scaring me. Her voice was light, and somewhat distant, almost as if the man sitting on the desk had drugged her. But, what could he have done to her? Mom wasn't drinking anything, or eating anything, so there had been no possible way for her to drug her, or anything.

What was going on?  
"Alright then!" Narumi said, clapping his hands, "Miss Mikan Sakura, congratulations, you're going to be a new student at Alice Academy!" He looked at me expectantly, despite the exclamations from the principal and vice principal. The two of them were standing, babbling about how sudden this was, but Serio silenced them with a look.

"What do you have to say about this, Miss Sakura?"

I could only nod.

* * *

"What's her profile?"

"Mikan Sakura, daughter of Yuka Sakura and Izumi Yukihara. Age, 15. Her father died when she was five years old. Some kind of car crash. Her grades are in the top ten, and she currently has no plans for college."

"The headmaster wants her... why?"

"I dunno! He doesn't tell me anything! Why are you always on my case about things?"

"Shut up Narumi and give me the rest of the file."

"Yeah yeah. Okay, so Mikan and her mom have moved around a lot, starting eight years ago. Every school report states that Mikan never has any friends, doesn't talk, and sometimes, teachers forget she's there. She almost never speaks, always does her homework, and hasn't ever gotten in trouble."

"She is not going to fit in very well."

"I'm sure she'll be fine. Girls always adapt."

* * *

"Natsume. Natsume. Natsu-"

"Shut the fuck up."

The blond calling his friends name held up his hands, leaning away from the black haired teen sleeping under a small oak tree.

"Dude, Natsume, class is about to start. You have to wake up now," the blond said, leaning down again, a smirk on his face. "I doubt Hotaru is just going to let you ditch any more classes. And, I know you don't want to get on her bad side."

Natsume just grunted, rolling on his side. Though it was true what his friend was saying, at the moment, he could care less. Narumi was gone on some kind of mission, the sub was a lame old guy who couldn't control the class, and he slept in there anyway. It was better to have some peace and quiet before Narumi came back.

"Natsume."

"Go away, Ruka. I want to sleep, and I won't get it in the hell hole."

"Oh," Ruka laughed, "it's not that bad. At least the teacher _let's_ you sleep."

"Yeah, let's me," Natsume snorted, rolling his eyes. "I bet if that old fart was able to get a hold of our class I wouldn't be allowed to sleep." Of course, he really meant that he would have more trouble sleeping because Narumi would be back, and that guy got what ever he wanted. Holding out his palm, Natsume lit a small flame, marveling at the dancing fire.

This was a power that belonged to only him, but he wasn't the only one at Alice Academy who had a strange ability such as this. In fact, everyone in this school possessed some strange ability that was considered dangerous by the government. The school put out a pretense of being a school for geniuses, and that's what many parents are told. However, that was no where near what the school actually was.

"Come on, Natsume," Ruka muttered, "Let's just go back to class. I really don't want Hotaru to try and kill us with one of her weirdo inventions."

With a grunt, Natsume sat up and put out the flame. "Fine. What ever."

* * *

I barely remember the hours that followed. I probably blacked out through most of it, most likely from shock. The first thing I did remember was being in my room, packing clothes. Nothing else was important to me. I mean, not even the clothing was, but I had to bring something. Photos, trinkets, jewelery... I only kept these things because Mom made me. I remember trying to get rid of a stuffed horse Dad gave me one time.

I wish I didn't remember that day.

After packing, I remember heading back to the first floor, where Mom was chatting happily with Narumi. Faking it, of course. I could tell that she was irritated by the way she twirled her hair. She always did that when she was irritated.

"So, I can visit on Sundays?" Mom asked, reaching for pen and paper. "Is that it? I thought I would be able to see her more often."

"Sorry Ma'am," Narumi replied, "I'm not the one who makes the rules. It's probably to protect the students, being genius and all." He shrugged and took the paper from Mom. "And don't worry about writing anything down. We'll call you with the information."

"Oh, thank you very much."

This is when I made my entrance, dragging my suitcase behind me, not bothering to put on a happy face for the camera. I wasn't happy, after all.

"There you are!" Narumi exclaimed when he saw me. "We don't have all day. Let's go, let's go!" I only nodded.

Then we were in a limo. It was weird. I'd never been in such a nice car before. Narumi briefed me on a few things, saying something about the school being a place for kids with special powers, and that I had two, nullification and SCE. I could care less, so I didn't pay attention.

I do remember something though; Narumi patted me on the shoulder, when we'd gotten to the school, and he said;

"This school is going to be good for you, Mikan."

* * *

"She's here?"

"Yeah. Why did you search her out-"

"None of your business."

"But-"

"Leave, Naru. I have business to attend to."

"Fine, fine. Anything you want me to tell Mikan before she meets her class."

"Yes. She's allowed one visit to Central Town, she's in the Special Class, and her rank is three stars."

"Three? Not special?"

"No. That would draw too much attention to her, and I don't think that's what she really wants, based on her profile."

"Hm... alright then."

"And one more thing."

"Yes sir?"

"Make sure Hyuuga, Imai, and Nogi don't scare her. Especially not Imai. I don't think she could deal with that kind of thing."

"A-Alright?"

"Thank you."

* * *

**Thanks for reading this. Sorry again that I sounded rash in my author's note. I guess I let my emotions take over sometimes... I mean, writing this, while watching a Criminal Minds episode about child abusers and predators... it's... unnerving, I guess... *sigh***

**~Sunechirei  
**


End file.
